Brother Complex
by Tsuki the Wolf
Summary: 'America' and 'Canada' have a blog that has a million followers. It is a story of their lives in the past full of abuse, heartache, and love. Arthur is one of the newest followers and he comes to find that they are closer than he had thought. Past and a little present Americest Main USUK PruCan
1. Chapter 1

_A/N: First off this is a new story, obviously, and this is going to involve my fetish for Americest (if you don't like it, I recommend leaving now) as a main portion for it. The story is set up so that most of the writing is in Alfred and Matthew's blog under the names of "America" and "Canada". But there will be other things other than what's in the blog too.  
I brought back my OC Nicole because I really don't have a pairing I like with Kiku, but I don't want him to be left out of the 'couples' groups and I love him too much to not have him be a part of the groups. So she's with him. Just ignore her. _

_Pairings: Americest (past and some present), USUK, PruCan, JapOC, and others._

_Warnings: Incest, angst, abuse._

**BlahBlah= Alfred blog aka America**

_**Blah Blah= **_**Matthew blog aka Canada**

BlahBlah= Any text outside of the blog

_This one's the short prologue chapter. Tell me your opinions, please!_

* * *

**Welcome, I guess, if anybody is reading this. I'm America, or that's what I'll be going as in this. It would be too risky to use my real name on this in case anybody who might read this knows me in real life. This blog will be about me and my brother Canada. We're going to be co-writing. It's a story of our life.**

_**You see, America and I have had a secret for a long time. It's been with us since we were children. Or I should say since we hit puberty, I suppose…but our story begins at our birth.**_

**To put it simply, Canada and I are in love with each other.**

_**Or, we were.**_

**Yeah, were. Things have changed now. But I'm getting ahead of the story.**

_**The whole point of our blog is not to get any viewers or any such things. It's actually more for our benefits. We want to get our story out –to know that we're not sick. I recommend to anybody who may be disgusted by the prospect of incest or homosexuality to leave, but this blog will explain why America and I were in love with each other.**_

**You should know we didn't do it on purpose. If possible, the two of us might actually have chosen not to, just to save the stress from it.**

_**But I don't regret it.**_

**No, and I don't either. It was the only comfort in our shitty lives. When our parents ruined them for us. When they stole us away from each other. When they broke our hearts…**

_**You're getting ahead of yourself, America.**_

**Haha, sorry.**

_**So we'll start from the beginning and to whoever wants to read this then they can. We don't mind. Comment if you want.**_

**But don't talk crap about us. We don't need that. We're not here for you to read our story and sling shit. So you guys can leave.**

_**Inside our story we have a lot of bad things…issues about our lives that hurt. It's painful just to think about them…but we'll push on.**_

**So then let's start! Right at the beginning with our birth!**

* * *

Arthur sat back in his chair, saving the webpage he was on and closing down his laptop. He was confused. He hadn't expected himself to really go on the website, but he had anyway. His friend Nicole had recommended it, claiming that the real-life drama story was amazing. Kiku had agreed, having read it himself. Arthur had been curious. Kiku was generally good at choosing interesting reads and even though Arthur wasn't one for true stories (he preferred fairytales and magical stories) his computer browsing had led him to the page.

It was a blog with a shocking amount of followers. Close to a million. He had only read the first entry, though. There were plenty more to read, but it was late at night. He would read them tomorrow. But the first entry had gotten him curious. A story of two brothers that were in love with each other? Arthur found himself blushing at the thought. He hadn't thought that it would be a homosexual story. Coming out to Kiku made him the testing grounds for 'yaoi'.

The thought of the story festered in his mind, wanting to read more but knowing he needed sleep. He would talk to Kiku and Nicole tomorrow. Maybe read the first true entry. No doubt they'll want his opinion. With that thought, he closed his eyes and fell asleep.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Okay, so I want to give the heads up that some of the chapters MAY be just blog entries (who knows? It might happen). Also, yes while the story is about Matthew and Alfred, the main character is Arthur and will focus mostly around him and his readings and such. Just so you know. And the blog entries are generally short.

_Inspiration songs that you may want to listen to considering they're the theme songs of the story: __**Romeo and Cinderella, Gemini, **__and __**Adolescenc**__e all by Rin and Len Kagamine._

**Blah = America**

_**Blah = **_**Canada**

Blah = Normal

* * *

**Entry 1  
I was never supposed to be born.**

**Or, I should say I wasn't planned for. My parents had wanted Canada, not me. They didn't expect to have twins. And on top of that they had expected a girl. God must've been like, "Oh, you wanted a girl? Trololol, here's two boys!" and poof, we were born.**

_**Needless to say, our parents weren't pleased.**_

**Yeah, seriously. What I wouldn't give to see their faces. But we can't remember our births or anything so now we go further into the future.**

_**One of my earliest and most prominent memories is that I almost never spent any time with my papa and I always wondered why. My papa would come over and pick America up when both of us were crying for food (I think we were three) and would take him to be fed. I would be left downstairs in the playroom until my mom came to get me. I was always more quiet of the two of us.**_

**From as far back as I can remember our parents have been biased against us. My mother loved my brother but ignored me and vice versa for my dad. I remember them fighting all of the time.**

_**They fought over which child was supposed to be born and which one wasn't.**_

**Dad thought it was me.**

_**Mom thought it was me.**_

**And so they ignored the child that "wasn't supposed to be born".**

_**But America and I thought of it differently. We loved each other. We were each other's only playmates. We cared for each other although not more than our parents. Back then we loved our parents even if they hated one of us…**_

* * *

Arthur quickly tapped out the address into his tablet and saved the site under his favourites before putting the tablet into his backpack and shutting down his computer. His heart beat rapidly at the first entry. One line repeated in his head endlessly: "I was never supposed to be born." The thought of his parents never wanting him was difficult to comprehend. He himself was the second youngest of five boys. He couldn't imagine his parents hating him. He shuddered. How did America and Canada feel about that?

He didn't take long arriving to school by his car and hurried to the student council office because he had to do a bit more paperwork before school officially started. He wanted to get done as soon as possible and hopefully read another entry. As he was on his last paper he heard a soft rap on the door and recognized his friend's knocking. "Come in, Kiku."

"I hope you're not busy, Arthur-kun." The short Japanese boy stepped into the room and approached the desk. The boy was actually in the grade ahead of Arthur but he looked younger than that –more like a freshman.

"No, I was just finishing up. Good morning."

"Yes, good morning." Arthur stacked the papers neatly.

"I've read a bit of the blog you and Nicole had told me about." He started conversationally. Kiku's eyes brightened a little, interested.

"Did you? And what do you think?"

"I've only read the introduction and the first entry, but it has certainly caught my interest."

"I would talk more about it, but I fear I may ruin something for you." His brown eyes turned solemn. "It's hard to believe that there are people on this planet who would ignore their own children."

"I know." Arthur agreed sadly.

"I'll go to meet Nicole-chan now. I will see you in class?"

"Yes, and if you see Gilbert give him a right hit in the head for me. He took my notebook to copy my notes again without telling me." He huffed a bit, annoyed at his albino friend. He always did that.

Kiku chuckled. "We will see." With that he waved goodbye and left. Arthur swiftly pulled out his tablet to read.

* * *

**Entry 2**

**Sometimes I wonder if my mom really did love me. I mean, she bathed me and potty trained me, but she was mentally and emotionally abusive. I remember when I was little –maybe five or six?- she screamed at me for dropping my ice cream cone calling me useless until my dad came in and started yelling at her. Canada had comforted me as I cried and gave me his ice cream cone. We shared it.**

_**Papa was physically abusive. Sometimes he would drop me or he'd kick me out of the way when he was carrying America. I was a toy that America didn't need and that annoyed papa. Mom usually screamed at dad for hurting me. I remember getting hurt a lot. The pre-k teachers we had wondered what happened but America and I would just say that we fight a lot. But that wasn't true. It wasn't us who did the fighting.**_

**We didn't-**

* * *

"Artie!" A force slammed against Arthur's chair and he felt arms sling around his shoulders in a hug as Arthur's other friend showed up. "Morning!"

"Alfred, you twit, you disturbed me!" Arthur fumed, having dropped his tablet. Alfred released him, frowning a little hurt as Arthur picked up his item.

"Sorry…I was just saying hi."

Arthur sighed, having become used to Alfred's antics. "It's fine. You startled me, is all. Watch where you throw your fat arse."

"Hey! I'm not fat!" Alfred denied and lifted his shirt to pat the abs on his abdomen. "All muscle, baby!" Arthur bit his tongue and his urge to blush back. Yes, Alfred's torso _was_ nice. By quite a bit. His whole body was. Alfred pulled Arthur into another hug this time and Arthur's eyes became half-lidded as the scent of Alfred's musky shampoo penetrated his nose deliciously. He subtly took a deep breath and sighed before pulling out of the hug. He wished that he could've stayed long.

"Yes, quite. Keep telling yourself that." He said after regaining himself and sat down in his chair. Alfred bounced over and sat on the desk in front of him. Arthur glared at him for sitting on his desk.

"So what'cha reading?" Alfred questioned, trying to peak. Arthur covered it, not wanting him to see. What if he knew about the blog and what was in it? He would guess that Arthur was gay. He was afraid of Alfred finding out.

"N-nothing. Something Nicole recommended."

"Oh yeah? Watch out 'cause it might have gay stuff in it. She does that."

"I…don't mind as long as it's a good story." Arthur avoided his eyes. Alfred blinked.

"Okay. Just giving you the heads up."

"I know, thank you." He looked around. "Where's your brother? He's usually with you."

Alfred's demeanor changed ever so slightly as he looked around quickly and then laughed. "Oh, he's outside the door with Gilbert! They were talking about something I didn't care about while we were walking so I came in here!"

"I see. Well, I want to finish this chapter and then let's head to class."

"Alright!" He grinned widely and plopped onto a couch to lay down. Arthur didn't appreciate it, but he returned to reading without saying anything.

* * *

**We didn't get all of the love from our parents and we were abused by them. I think that's what started the 'brotherly love' between us. We cared for each other. I scraped my knee and Canada was the one to put a band-aid on it. We didn't like hassling our parents for fear the other would be yelled at. But because of that 'brotherly love' we were forced apart.**

_**The two of us are, without a doubt, the closest brothers who have ever lived. We've done everything together that we could. We took care of each other in a way our parents should have but didn't. The other kids didn't understand why America and I would hold hands even while playing. They thought it was weird. The teachers encouraged us not to and separated us, but we always made our way back to each other. We're like Gemini.  
We like to think that maybe the two of us are two parts of the same whole.**_

* * *

(And then, just because I think it'll be interesting)  
**Response To **_**Lunar Iris**_**:  
America: Oh, we actually have readers? Haha, I'll try to stay on track! And I'll take that hug! :D *hugs you***

**Canada: **_**Ah…yeah, America tends to get sidetracked. I-I don't mind a hug. :) And we're happy to have followers.**_


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: GYAH, I'm so sorry for any errors I make! Please tell me if you see any major ones so I can fix it! I tend to be too lazy to thoroughly go through these until later or I'm just too tired. I'm so sorry. OTL

* * *

**Entry 3**

_**I feel in love with America on a day I still remember. It was Christmas day and America and I were nine years old. Papa went off to go to the bathroom and our mom went to get some hot chocolate for me. America and I stayed standing where they had left us in the park, holding hands. We never let go of each other's hand. It was cold and snowing and we were bundled up in thick coats. We were sitting on a bench when a young couple passed by and paused not far from us. The man talked to the woman for a minute before he went down on one knee and held up a tiny box with a ring in it. She was ecstatic and she jumped up and down before holding out her hand. He put the ring on her finger and they hugged and kissed as the proposal was accepted.**_

_**America and I had stared, not understanding what had just happened. We were sheltered children –homeschooled for most of our lives. America suddenly looked at me with excited eyes that he always developed when he had an idea. "I'll be right back! Wait here, okay?" I nodded knowing that if he said he would be back then he would be. America never broke his promises to me. So America ran off. During the time he was gone I looked around for our parents but never saw them. I only felt a little scared. I was more worried about my brother.**_

_**Then America came running back and stood in front of me puffing. I had questioned him about where he had gone. He didn't answer as he tried to get his breath back. Then he asked me to get off the bench. I did and stood in front of him. He smiled so widely and got down on one knee before pulling out a rectangular box that had contained the new watch he had gotten for Christmas and opened it to reveal a ring. It was one of those cheap plastic rings with fake silver and a plastic ruby that girls used a part of dress up. But it was a ring and it had meaning to it.**_

_**I mimicked what the woman had done and jumped up and down saying yes before holding my hand out. America put the ring on the wrong finger, but we didn't know any better. I hugged him and kissed him on the lips feeling my heart pound with glee and I felt completely happy for the first time in my life. I didn't really know what the feeling was.**_

_**But then our moment ended as we were yanked from each other and our parents began screaming at each other. "Keep your FAGGOT away from my son!" My mom yelled.**_

"_**Your son was the one who initiated it!" Papa yelled back. My mom threw my cocoa at them and it burst on America and papa. America screamed in pain and I tried to run for him but I was scooped up and taken from my brother. I had sobbed, wanting to go to him as he too was taken and he cried for me.**_

"_**You're too old to be sleeping with [America] anymore. You'll get your own room now, [Canada]." My mom used that sickly sweet voice mothers used when cooing over their children. I was devastated. That day I fell in love with my brother. That day I began hating my mom.  
I still have that ring.  
America now bears the burn scar from that drink on his hair line. He covers it with his bangs.**_

* * *

"Hey Artie, are you alright? You're crying!"

"Yeah…yeah, I just read something very sad, is all."

* * *

Each day Arthur read one entry, at least. Kiku and Nicole were correct in saying it was a captivatingly sorrowful story. The next numbers of entries were short instances of America and Canada's lives. Their mom screaming at America, their father hitting Canada for no reason, short tales of America and Canada's child playing together, and foreshadowing events to come. Arthur could see and feel his own hatred for the parents growing and morphing in response to the twins' and the stories they shared as time passed in the blog.

"I hate them." He stated to Kiku, Nicole, and Gilbert one day after school. Alfred and Matthew had gone home on their bus. The four others were in Arthur's car driving to get some fast food. Arthur was disappointed that neither of the twins could come. He had been hoping to spend some time with Alfred.

"Hate who?" Nicole asked, fixing her uniform plaid dress so that it covered more of her thigh. She thought it was far too short.

"America and Canada's parents."

"Oh! Yeah, seriously."

"I agree as well." Kiku said.

Gilbert took one of his headphones out of his ear. Arthur recognized "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" playing from it. He rolled his eyes at his choice of music, finding it a little bit appropriate for the topic. "What are you talking about? Countries?"

"It's a really interesting blog about real life brothers. They're telling their story and it's so beautiful and tragic!" Nicole romanticized.

"Oh, really?" Gilbert didn't sound too interested.

"I recommend you read it. It's called 'Brother Complex'." Kiku said seriously. Arthur raised an eyebrow wondering why Kiku was insisting.

Gilbert appeared a bit startled too. "I'll check it out." Kiku nodded.

"How far are you, Arthur-kun?" He asked Arthur. Arthur pulled to a stop at Subway and parked.

"Entry twenty. They've only really talked about their childhood events."

"It'll pick up soon." Nicole promised. "It's going to get better from there."

"Is that so?" They entered the shop and stood in line.

"Yeah." Nicole frowned sadly. "It becomes sadder."

"Oh…."

"A-ah, hi guys." They all looked to see Matthew standing and smiling behind the sandwich counter. Gilbert swooped in as close as he could with the counter between them to flirt.

"Birdie! What are you doing here?" He leaned on the counter and grinned lop-sidedly.

Matthew looked away with a delicate blush. Arthur knew that he often blushed. He sighed inwardly wishing that he could get Alfred to blush like that. He would look so cute. "I work here, Gilbert…What are you doing here?"

"We're getting food!" Nicole came up. "Can we order?"

"Ah! Of course!" Matthew fumbled and took Nicole's order and then looked around. Arthur was about to ask where Alfred was when Matthew called, "Al! Come on! We have customers!" Arthur's thudded to a start in excitement as Alfred ran out dressed in his uniform. Arthur wanted to kiss him badly.

"Oh wow! Hey guys! What's up?" He was finishing buttoning up his shirt while grinning.

"Al, you need to help me." Matthew told him.

"Right!" He jumped onto the other side of his brother and leaned forward towards Arthur. "What would you like?" Arthur leaned in a little closer and opened his mouth to start to say, "You, nice and hot," but he stopped himself with an embarrassed flush. He cursed his own hormones and instead told Alfred his order. Alfred didn't seem to notice his blush and went about normally. Arthur glared jealously at Gilbert. He was openly flirting with Matthew and he seemed to be making more progress than Arthur himself. It annoyed him greatly.

* * *

**Entry 21**

**We were twelve when things changed. Canada and I slept in the same bed together even when our parents said that we weren't allowed to. But they had caught on. They demanded that we sleep separately saying we were too old. What was so wrong with me sleeping with my brother, though? It wasn't like he was a girl hitting puberty or something. But they wanted me in another room. So that night I said good night and was about to leave when Canada grabbed the bottom of my shirt.**

_**I didn't want America to leave. I was scared to sleep alone. I didn't want to be separated from him. I loved him. So made an excuse up saying I was afraid of the monsters. **_

**I had laughed a little. Isn't that a little childish? I had asked. But his eyes were terrified and watery. I understood. I didn't want to leave either. But looking into his eyes a flash of heat ran through me. I didn't know what it was but I had a sudden urge. And I was never one to resist my urges.**

_**America locked the door and led me to the bed and pushed me down on it to crawl over me. I had looked at him in shock, not understanding what he was doing. He looked confused by his own actions but he was asking something silently. It passed between us without needing to speak. I agreed. He leaned down and kissed me. My body's reaction startled me as I clung to his shirt, wanting more.**_

**That night Canada and I didn't have sex. We were too young. We didn't know what to do. Our bodies reacted to each other in a way it shouldn't have. All I wanted to do was touch my brother. His hair, his skin, his lips; any place that I could reach. I couldn't stop myself or my body. It scared me, not understanding but not willing to stop.**

_**Our bodies seemed to move by instinct to pull us the closest as we possibly can. I only wanted America. The first person to touch me in a sexual way was my own brother. And I couldn't have been happier.**_

**After the event had calmed down the both of us could only stare at each other in shock, not understanding why our pants were sticky or wet or why our dicks had gotten hard. It had never happened before. It was confusing. But I felt satisfied in a way I hadn't known I could've been before and so it didn't matter. Canada fell asleep soon after that in my arms. I stayed awake and got up to leave the room. It was only right. I was his hero, after all. I didn't want dad waking up and seeing us together. I didn't want Canada to get hurt.**

_**I wasn't asleep when America left, though. I was awake. And I cried knowing why he left.  
I just wanted to be with my brother.**_


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: I wish I had enough room in the description to add that this is 'past Americest' but the damn limit…

Anyway, the chapters onwards should be back to the usual 3,000+ words per chapter now. I had to get out of that groove of writing short chapters from

* * *

**Entry 22**

**For the next couple of weeks Canada and I snuck around and shared kisses. We wanted to make our bodies react like they had that night in bed.**

_**But at the same time we were terrified. What exactly was wrong with us? Was this normal? Are our feelings normal? We were constantly plagued by these thoughts.**_

**But they didn't stop us from exploring our relationship. We didn't have a computer, see? So we couldn't exactly look up what was wrong with us and we didn't know about sexual activities and such. And our parents censored the TV. We had to learn from hands-on. And I mean literally. By the end of the year Canada and I knew each other's bodies like our own.**

_**And through that process we came to the shocking revelation that we didn't look exactly alike anymore. America was slightly taller and his hands were bigger. His voice had started changing. He had reached the stages of puberty before me. Even though my own body followed soon behind, America was always taller and his voice slightly deeper than mine. We weren't mirror images of each other anymore.**_

**Eventually those days came to an end. On our birthday our parents finally had enough of each other. The divorce papers were signed.**

_**We didn't know what was happening. Mamma was packing up both mine and her stuff. I tried asking her. "We're going somewhere better," she had replied. I asked about America and papa. "They're not coming." Her voice had been cold. It chilled me. I didn't ask any more.**_

**Canada and I screamed and kicked and fought once we found out that we would never see each other again. We were being torn in two. I cried for him not caring the fuss I made as I cried out for my brother. He was me and I was him. We were two of the same person. It was like tearing a soul in half. Sinful.**

**I managed to grab Canada's hand and we clung to each other for dear life, but our parents were stronger and our hands were yanked from each other's. Mom took Canada away from me. I doubted that I would ever see him again. **

* * *

"Alfred! Yo, Al!" Gilbert called to Alfred as he ran to catch up to him. Arthur and Alfred turned and Gilbert caught up to grab a hold of Alfred's shoulder.

"What's up?" Alfred asked, grinning.

"Hey, where's your brother? He said that he would help the awesome me with my homework and I can't find him." Gilbert huffed a little to catch his breath.

"Why not have Ludwig help? He's smart enough." Arthur said. Gilbert sent him a look. It clearly said that he thought Arthur was stupid for asking considering he knew that Gilbert liked Matthew. Arthur could read his old friend well.

"Mattie's checking in with his teacher about his homework. He'll be back in a bit." Alfred informed him, checking his watch.

Gilbert groaned. "I thought he was coming home with me!" Arthur smirked, happy about his friend being cockblocked. "I have to leave!"

"Mine and Mattie's bus is in the next wave. You wanna ride home with us?"

"I don't know." He looked against it. He wanted Matthew to himself.

Arthur looked over his shoulder. "Well the first wave is gone now."

"_Verdammt_. Oh well." Gilbert shrugged. "I'll go home with you two, I guess." But as he said this he sent Arthur another look. Arthur considered his unspoken proposal for a moment before agreeing. This would benefit them both, after all.

"Alfred, perhaps you'd like to come home with me? You haven't come over to my house before." Arthur suggested. Alfred appeared surprised.

"Sure! Oh, but let me tell Mattie first! I'll go get him!" He ran off. Gilbert slapped Arthur on the back in thanks.

"You owe me." Arthur stated.

"_Ja, danke._"

* * *

"Wow! Artie, this is your house?" Alfred gaped at Arthur's house, the place being one of the nicest in the neighborhood. It was large with two floors and a basement that acted as the bedrooms for the three eldest sons of the Kirkland family. They enjoyed the rough-housing downstairs. The house was painted white with a dark green trim around the edges and windows. The door was the same colour and so were the curtains. Arthur parked his car in the driveway and turned it off.

"Yes, this is my home." He said, climbing out of the car. Alfred jumped out of his seat and onto the perfectly manicured lawn, awed by how beautiful the house was. The Kirklands prided themselves in their abode and Arthur felt his metaphorical feathers puff up with pride.

"So cool!" Alfred ran up to the door and waited for Arthur to join him, bouncing on the balls of his feet. "You're lucky, dude. Mine and Mattie's apartment is so freaking tiny. We share a room."

"Really?" Arthur unlocked his door and opened it, toeing off his shoes. Alfred copied him. "I don't think I could handle sleeping in the same room as any of my brothers."

"You don't like them?" Arthur shushed Alfred a bit to tell him to lower his voice. "Sorry."

"It's fine and they're…a hassle that I could do without, but that doesn't mean they're not still my siblings." He led Alfred up to his bedroom with his heart pounding, feeling unwillingly nervous as they entered the room. Despite how the house looked with extravagant Victorian furniture, Arthur's room was quite simple. He had a king sized bed with a canopy of deep scarlet with a matching comforter. On his wall hung the Union flag with the English flag right beneath it. They took up that wall by themselves. The room had a desk big enough for Arthur to work on papers and have his laptop next to him at the same time. The desk appeared to be made of redwood or at least finished to look that way. His closet was large and a walk-in one with various types of clothes in it from Halloween costumes to the school uniform. A six-string sat in the corner with an amp and the other walls were occupied by a few sketches and pictures of fantastic creatures from fairy tales and/or Arthur's imagination. He had a couple of photos on his bedside dresser and on the walls, but there were not many. Most of those he kept in a photo album that was hidden away. He didn't want any of his brothers to steal them. The plush carpet was crème and the walls were a faded light blue giving a feel of openness and at the same time security, like an isolated beach.

"Wow, you're so lucky you're rich." Alfred marveled, turning to look at everything in the room. He dropped his bag and ran over to the bed to jump on it, ruining the beautifully made covers. Arthur clicked his tongue in dissatisfaction but put the scolding aside for the moment as he moved their bags to the corner of the room and then joined Alfred to lie on the bed.

"I suppose." He said and closed his eyes, absorbing the comfort of his bed and the presence of Alfred beside him. It was such an easy feeling, being around the sophomore. He gave off an air of freedom –as if as long as you're by him nothing can go wrong and you can do whatever you please. It was as dangerous an aura as it was good, often times tempting Arthur to break his own laws because of it. He was always slightly on guard the instant his body decided it was time to disobey his brain.

"So it's kind of weird for you to invite me over so sudden. What's up with that?" Alfred rolled onto his side to watch his friend. Arthur turned his head to look at him, resisting his body's urge to touch Alfred's face. There was something mysterious that eluded Arthur an explanation that hung around Alfred in his aura, in his face, in his very being. Arthur wanted to grasp that mystery and discover its truth which in turn told his body to touch Alfred's face. He held back. There was something hidden in Alfred's eyes and Arthur internally sighed wishing for once those eyes didn't look like they had a wall there. Sometimes he wondered if he was the only one that could see it.

"I would've invited you over sooner, but my parents only allow one person at a time on weekdays and usually Gilbert or my cousin Francis invades my house whenever they deem fit."

"Oh…how's your relationship with your parents?" Alfred asked, that wall in his eyes darkening his eyes more. Arthur tread carefully, unsure of what this change in Alfred's eyes –really, Alfred's eyes exposed all of the boy's emotions if one just paid attention well enough- was and not wanting to make it worse. He wanted to use this alone time to open Alfred up to him, not push him away.

"We have a fairly basic one; we talk at dinner, chat during the day, and such. What about you?" Alfred's eyes darkened more from that sunny summer blue sky to a cloudy day hidden behind wire-framed glasses. They looked almost a grey-blue now. _Damn._ Arthur cursed himself. He hadn't stepped carefully enough.

"We don't talk at all to our parents." His voice was closed off. Arthur resisted a shiver at the cold tone. He wanted to hug his friend.

"Do you…not get along with them?"

"You could say that." Alfred rolled onto his back and stared up at the canopy. "Mattie and I are free from our parents."

"You're emancipated?"

"If that's the word for it." Arthur waited for more but Alfred didn't go on. The boy suddenly grinned at Arthur, his eyes still hard but there was a change in demeanor about him. "So what are we gonna do?"

Arthur hummed and sat up, grateful but disappointed by the change in topic. He felt that he didn't know Alfred at all. He wanted to learn more. "Homework first. And then we can do whatever."

Alfred groaned but got up. "Fine." He walked over to the backpacks and brought out their textbooks. Arthur led him to a kotatsu that had been hidden on the other side of Arthur's bed and sat down on one of the large chair pillows. He mentally thanked Kiku for his gift again because it was useful for homework and warmth. He didn't turn on the kotatsu, though, because it was fairly warm in the room. Alfred appeared thrilled by the exotic table and plopped down on one of the pillows near Arthur and opened up the books on the table.

* * *

After about an hour Alfred excused himself to go to the bathroom. "It's three doors down on the left. Try not to make too much noise. My little brother is probably sleeping."

Alfred was surprised. "Three older brothers and a younger one? Damn, your parents were busy." Arthur rolled his eyes.

"My father had the first three with three separate women and then married my mother when she was pregnant with me. Peter is my only full-blooded brother."

Alfred stuck his tongue out to show his distaste. "I didn't think that was what happened."

"Go to the restroom, you git." Arthur told him and Alfred saluted mockingly before leaving. Arthur took this chance to pull out his tablet and open up the next entry on America and Canada's blog. He was excited and worried for how the twins reacted to being forced apart in such a way.

* * *

**Entry 23**

_**America and I lived close to the border between America and Canada (the countries) and so it was easy for my mamma to take me across the border. That's why we chose the names we did for us. I was forced to live in Canada and America stayed in America. I loved Canada, but I hated the distance between my brother and I. I wanted to go home but this was "home" now. I cried for a week.**_

**Without my brother and mom here, dad changed. He wasn't as mean. He smiled more and he seemed generally cheerful. But he also drank more and smoked and he tended to bring home strangers –male and female. I don't know how many he fucked, but even at that age and by the noises I heard I understood he was doing similar things to what Canada and I did. But his felt dirty and disgusting, like it wasn't supposed to happen. At least with my brother it felt strange but not necessarily bad.**

_**Mamma was nicer but she had a horrible temper. I was afraid to make her angry. She didn't beat me but she screamed like a banshee. It hurt my ears. I was afraid to talk in fear or making her angry. I just nodded to whatever she said. She dated a lot, leaving me home alone all night at least once a week. My only comfort was my stuffed polar bear Mr. Kumakichi that America had bought me.**_

**His name is actually Mr. Kumajiro…**

_**Oh, I forgot. Kumajiro. That's his name.**_

**Anyway, dad became physically abusive of me when angry –especially if he was drunk. He hit me and scratched my back and then told me not to tell anyone because when he calmed down he apologized a lot. I didn't know how I felt about him. The closest word I can think of is maybe pity. But whenever he beat me all I could think was, "Is this how Canada felt when he lived here?" and then all my pity would leave.  
I still have scars on my chest and back and legs from that time. They're faded, but in the sunlight they glow white against my tan skin. It's embarrassing. I can't even go swimming without wearing a shirt. I'm afraid to go swimming with my friends. I don't want them to ask where I got them from. But I love swimming and going to the beach. It's just too bad that I can't.**

* * *

Arthur sat back and glanced away from his tablet, thinking about this new entry. That last paragraph hit closer to home for Arthur. He and his older brothers had fought physically before in the past and Arthur still had a scar on his side from when one of his ribs had been broken and it had pierced his skin. It embarrassed him to show it in public because it was a reminder that he couldn't defeat his brothers. He wasn't strong enough. He also had thin claw marks scarred onto his shoulder from their old cat named Nessie that had attacked him. They were deep gashes and the marks were still there. He was happy that his skin was so pale that the scars barely showed up unless looked upon closely. But they were still embarrassing. He wondered how many scars America had and where they all were.

He was about to type a comment to America about how he felt about the entry when a voice near his ear asked, "You read that?"

Arthur screamed and jumped before covering his face at his own humiliation. He glared at Alfred. "Don't sneak up on me, idiot!" He yelled.

Alfred's face was void of emotion, though. "You read that blog?" He ignored Arthur's outburst. Arthur felt his anger simmer in light of the lack of emotion. It caused the hairs on his neck to stick up. Alfred's face should never look like that.

"I do." He said softly, closing the blog and turning off his tablet. "You know of it?"

"Yeah, I do. I've read it all."

Arthur felt a little defensive and fearful. He hoped Alfred didn't judge him for reading it. "Well, is it a problem to you? Kiku and Nicole recommended it to me."

Alfred's eyes held something else in them –confusion? Worry? Anger?- now. "No…it's not a problem. I'm not going to stop you from reading whatever you want. It's just…it's a gay blog, you know?"

Arthur defense rose in response to his fear. "And? I can't enjoy it anyway?"

Alfred held his hands up to show he wasn't attacking him. "I'm not saying you can't! I'm just giving you the heads up, y'know?"

Arthur relaxed a little. "I already know. I'm quite far into it now."

"Oh."

"So…what was your opinion of it?" Alfred jumped on the bed to lie on his stomach looking at Arthur.

"Eh, it's okay. I don't really care for it." He shrugged.

"Really? I think it's enthralling." Arthur gazed at his tablet somewhat sadly. "It's strange to believe that such people exist to have lived this story. It's not the worst thing I've read, but it's still shows the depths of humanity. Two brothers falling in love with each other? Such a story is not heard everywhere. I can't help but wonder where they are now and if they're happier."

Alfred's eyes sparkled with mirth for a second before he bit it back. "They make more entries, like, every two weeks or so."

"I realize that. But I'm not that far yet. I'm only on entry twenty-four."

"Okay. Well, let's finish up because I'm starving!" Alfred once again randomly changed the subject and hopped back to the kotatsu to pull the homework towards them. Arthur placed his tablet to the side and agreed. He was quite hungry as well. He gazed at Alfred from the corner of his eye and saw the boy looked a little worried. He wondered what Alfred could possibly have to worry about and why he was so bothered by the story. But Arthur hadn't received a negative response from Alfred about the homosexuality in the story. Alfred himself had even read it. Arthur's heart held hope.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Okay, I kind of lied. They're not ALL going to be back to the 3000+ words a chapter. Most will be about 2000+ or so. But it's the content that matters, right? Haha

* * *

**Entry 25**

**When we were in our final year of middle school, our parents decided to send us to a public school. We were surprised but happy. I mean, we've never hung out with kids our ages. It was going to be fun. It was probably the best thing that our parents ever did for us.**

_**It was a school right on the border. We both lived within the school district and so by luck or miracle we ended up going to the same school. When we saw each other in the hallways at school we were shocked.**_

**My eyes nearly filled with tears and I had screamed my brother's name before making a mad dash over and hugging him tightly. He had grown.**

_**We both had.**_

**It was weird to hold Canada in my arms. It was the first time in over a year. We were nearly grown-ups now. But it didn't matter. We had found each other again. We clung to each other for dear life, afraid to let go.**

_**Eventually we did to go to class, though. We promised not to tell either of our parents. It was a secret between us. We weren't so naïve to think that if we told our parents we wouldn't be forced to go to another school.**_

**For once, everything was going right.**

* * *

Arthur felt cheered as he entered the classroom and sat down in his seat with Gilbert sitting on the other side of him. The senior was using his feet to tip his chair back on two legs balancing a pencil on his top lip. He glanced over at his childhood friend. "What's up with you, eyebrows?"

"Don't call me that." Arthur said, glaring a little at him but in too good of a mood after reading the entry from earlier. He noticed that Gilbert's face was threatening to split into a triumphant grin. He was just waiting to brag. Arthur threw him a bone. "What are _you_ grinning about?"

"Birdie and I have become a lot closer." He stated proudly, his already massive ego rising.

"Because of me." Arthur threw in so that he would receive some credit.

"_Ja_. I owe you. So what about you?"

Arthur twirled his pencil absently. What was his relationship with Alfred now? "Yeah, so how about you?" Nicole suddenly appeared with her head peeking over the edge of Arthur's desk childishly and Kiku standing behind her. It wouldn't be long now before Alfred and Matthew showed up.

"Hello, Arthur-kun." Kiku greeted.

"Good morning. And about Alfred and me…" He trailed off and sighed. "I suppose we're closer to each other. I know a little more about him, but I feel like I really don't know him."

"I got the same impression from Birdie." Gilbert said a little quieter. Arthur nodded along with Nicole.

"We've never asked them about their lives, right?" Nicole asked. "It's not like we ask those kinds of questions of each other."

"Everyone has secrets…" Kiku murmured mysteriously and Nicole looked at him. There was something that Arthur felt he missed but he didn't receive the chance to explore it as Alfred busted into the classroom followed by Matthew coming in after calmly.

"Morning, guys!" Alfred called and ran over, sliding on his bottom on the long desks and to a stop in front of Arthur, grinning. Nicole clapped at his feat. Arthur frowned.

"Get off, Alfred. You'll get us both in trouble." He told him.

"Jeez, Artie. You have the biggest stick shoved up your ass I have ever seen!" He pouted.

Arthur was instantly offended and angry. "What do you mean? Perhaps you play around far too much!"

"Dude, chill." Alfred laughed. "Don't get so pissy!"

"Alfred, apologize to him. That was mean to say." Matthew admonished his brother. Gilbert wrapped an arm around him.

"Yeah, listen to Birdie!" He agreed.

Alfred's cheeks puffed out in fake anger but his eyes darkened with something real and it startled Arthur to notice it. "Nobody likes a kiss-ass." He took Matthew from Gilbert and hugged him to him. Gilbert looked annoyed at that. Matthew wiggled a little in his brother's grasp and the two shared a look Arthur couldn't interpret before Alfred released him.

He turned to Kiku. "Um…Kiku, Nicole, may we speak with you?"

"Of course." Kiku agreed and Nicole and he followed Matthew and Alfred out of the room. Gilbert and Arthur watched them leave with frowns.

"What's that about, you think?" Gilbert asked.

"I haven't a clue." Arthur responded. Arthur felt his paranoid side become suspicious. Why did he feel like those four had a secret between them? He wanted to know.

A few minutes later they came back in with a change in the atmosphere around them. Alfred and Matthew looked almost nervous while Nicole and Kiku appeared completely serious. They were discussing things quietly until they reached Arthur and Gilbert. Arthur's suspicions became stronger. Gilbert didn't seem to be faring much better, his eyes slightly narrowed. They didn't get to question the foursome though as the bell rang and everybody began travelling to their seats. Arthur walked over to the pencil sharpener and was walking back when he felt hands run up his sides. He gasped, surprised and jumped and turned to face a grinning Alfred.

"Don't do that!" He hissed, blushing. Arthur wasn't one for public displays of affection but on top of that it was like he was flirting. It caught him off-guard.

Alfred laughed. "You're super skinny, Artie! You should eat more!" He said and went over to sit in his seat in front of Arthur. Arthur sat down in his seat and spent the next ten minutes of class wondering what the touch from Alfred had meant. Did this mean they were close enough to touch each other in such a way? Or was Alfred actually flirting with him? Arthur didn't know. He wasn't used to anybody (besides Francis, but he didn't count) flirting with him. He had only dated one other person (Kiku, actually) before and Kiku most definitely wasn't the type to flirt. He was confused and so he pushed the thought away. His sides tingled where Alfred had touched them and so he gazed at the back of Alfred's head as if it revealed all of his thoughts.

* * *

**Entry 26**

_**It was a wonderful secret between us, having discovered each other at school. Our parents had no idea because our last names were different. Mamma changed my last name. We could be with each other every day except on the weekends. But we could wait to see each other. It was better than thinking we would never see each other ever again.**_

**We were fourteen and more worldly now that we were in public school. The kids talked about sex all of the time. It was kind of hard not figure out where your dick goes when the boys were bragging about their sex lives.**

_**Although they were mostly untrue.**_

**But peer pressure got a hold of us.**

_**Or mostly America.**_

**I snuck to Canada's house late one night. It wasn't hard to cross the border. After all, I was just a kid going to visit his brother. I had looked up directions and it only took me thirty minutes to get to my brother's house. I threw rocks at his window –he slept on the second floor- and he told me about the tree that was easy to climb to get to his bedroom. I made it up there.**

_**We don't know what triggered it that night –maybe it was the full moon?- but instead of the touching and movements against each other like we had done the last time we were in bed together, we went further. We had sex. It had hurt, but I loved it.**_

**Canada and I had been experimenting but that night was the first night we ever had sex. It felt…wrong in a sense, but that feeling of wrongness was too small to bother the large feeling of completeness. Canada and I had always felt like we were one being split into two (I've said that before, right?) so that physical connection we had made the emotional one all the more special. It was the closest we could get to being one and it had felt amazing.**

_**That night there was nothing between us but the sounds of our heartbeats and breaths aligning as one. Our bodies no longer stood between us. For the first time I felt that I had finally reached America's soul.**_

_**And that feeling has stuck with me even to now.**_

* * *

Arthur had stayed late after school finishing the paperwork needed for the student council president. Arthur had wondered if perhaps it was just his teachers dropping the work onto him instead so they wouldn't have to do it. But he still did it. He enjoyed his position of the president.

He gazed up at the sky and saw the clouds were gathering. _It's going to rain any second now._ He realized and like a pin in a balloon that thought seemed to pop the clouds and the rain came pouring down. Arthur cursed and ran for the nearest overhang to wait it out. He cursed his luck. He needed to get home for supper, his clothes were soaked, and now he couldn't get to his car. It was on the other side of the school.

He heard a cry over the roar of the downpour and he started, looking around for the source of the cry. He listened again and heard another one. He ran in that direction. He looked through the sheet of near-white rain to see three figures. One was against the wall and the two others were closing in on the kid. _Bullies._ Arthur realized angrily and moved closer to see who they were. He was shocked to discover the cornered boy was his friend.

"Matthew!" He called, but the boy didn't seem to hear him. One of the bullies –Arthur didn't recognize them. He assumed they were seniors- yanked Matthew's hair and said something to the poor boy that Arthur couldn't hear. He was about to run closer to go help his friend when a fourth figure ran in out of nowhere and slammed a fist into the assaulter's face. Arthur recognized Alfred; the boy's face the picture of fury as he took on both of the bullies at once. He fought brilliantly taking hit after hit and returning it with twice as much force. The fact that Alfred worked out everyday probably attributed to his strength.

Arthur was frozen where he stood in the torrent watching the fight until the two boys finally cursed and ran off shouting about how stupid the fight was. Alfred stood breathing hard and bleeding from multiple injuries. Matthew ran forward and turned him around. "Are you okay, Al?" He asked, terrified.

Alfred's anger simmered. "Yeah. Are you?" He looked his brother over. Matthew had no injuries beside a split lip. Alfred rubbed the injury with his thumb, glaring at it like it was the cause of all his problems. "Dammit, if only I got here sooner. I was just getting an umbrella…you should have come with me."

Matthew began crying, his body shaking more violently than one who experienced bullying should have. He clung to his brother's shirt. "I'm sorry!"

Alfred's eyes softened in a way Arthur had never experienced. He had thought he had seen Alfred exposed before when he was happy, but at this moment Arthur was able to glimpse into the heroic teen's soul. His walls were completely down and Arthur was able to easily read –even from his spot hidden to the twins- that Alfred was terrified as he held his brother and stroked his back.

"It's okay, Mattie." He placed his hands on Matthew's cheeks and tilted his head back out of his shirt so that he could kiss his brother's forehead and wipe the tears with his thumbs. He then rested their foreheads together. "You're safe, right?" He smiled. "Let's go home and take a bath before we get sick!" Matthew hugged him and Alfred led them away. Arthur was left standing there in surprise at the scene. Somehow it felt more intimate than the literal actions led to believe. And somehow it felt familiar.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Once again, sorry for any language errors. Google translate isn't always the best way. OTL Please correct me if I'm wrong and I'll change it! :D  
I need ideas for my pirate story…

* * *

Arthur was suspicious. More than suspicious, really. He felt like there were secrets –large, hard to ignore ones- within his group of close friends. He didn't like it. Arthur felt the urge to discover these secrets. He wasn't prying, but simply wanted to know just a little bit of information to find out if they were too private. But more specifically he wanted to know Alfred's secret. He knew that the teen had always had a secret but he knew that it was hidden between the boy and his brother Matthew. And Arthur was fine with that. He would let Alfred have his secret.

But now Arthur felt that Kiku and Nicole were in on that secret. What did they know that Arthur didn't? Why did they know when Arthur couldn't? He wanted to be a part of the secret. He could and would hide one if possible. It dug at him from every possible angle. Nicole and Kiku knew Alfred better than Arthur did. They were closer to him. He was jealous (not that he would ever admit it aloud) of the bond they shared formed by that secret.

Arthur knew that if Gilbert was keen enough, he would've noticed the bond as well. And chances are he would've had a partner in crime. He thought about following the group of four –they kept going off to talk about things alone together- sneakily. It made him feel like a spy. But at the same time he felt it would be wrong. But he wanted to know. He wanted to know so very badly. He wanted to be close with Alfred.

* * *

**Entry 27**

**A couple people made comments about the sex thing. I'm pretty sure we mentioned in the beginning that Canada and I had an incestual (Lol, is that even a word?) relationship. Yes, we had sex. Get over it. We warned you guys.**

_**The sex didn't stop there, though. We didn't do it often –we were afraid of being caught- but it wasn't like we could stop. How to describe to someone the feeling? It's impossible. The feeling of being complete probably didn't come to many people. Only those who have ever truly found their soul mate know.**_

**But…I knew that Canada wasn't my soul mate. There was that feeling of being whole…but there was a part missing. A tiny sliver of a piece. And I knew what it was. It was the part of me that told me that I shouldn't be with my brother. It was wrong. We were related. We shouldn't be doing these kinds of things. But I ignored it. I love my brother.**

_**We tried desperately to fill that void. We were meant for each other, right? This was okay, right? We were born to be together, right? So why wouldn't that feeling go away? I wanted it gone. We wanted it gone. There was no way that there could be someone else for us besides each other.  
**_

**…..Right?**

* * *

Arthur was a sophomore in high school when he first met Alfred and Matthew. The twins were freshmen just starting out in the big bad high school setting. Arthur had a class with Alfred but wasn't impressed by his attitude. He was loud, obnoxious, and overbearing with his 'heroics' and optimistic attitude. On top of that he had an amazing charisma that just drew people to him. Arthur resisted the pull. He didn't want to get involved with that type of guy.

But apparently Gilbert did and soon Arthur spotted the two of them chatting. Kiku wasn't impressed by Alfred either and tended to sit with Arthur instead of having to listen to two of the loudest ego-maniacs in the school. Matthew also sat with Alfred and Gilbert and even though Arthur didn't hear him speak much, he was directly in the conversation because both Gilbert and Alfred made sure he was never left out. Eventually, Kiku's girlfriend Nicole soon decided that she wanted to introduce herself to these two freshman boys that she had heard high regards of from Gilbert. She quickly became friends with them as well. Kiku followed behind shortly after.

Arthur was the last to finally give in and go to join the group. And he admitted that he didn't regret it…after a while. He and Alfred fought often and argued over little things. But the arguing brought them closer. Soon instead of arguing just at lunch, it was in class, in the halls, to Arthur's car, after school…everywhere. Arthur was actually spending his free time with Alfred. And soon their fighting died down to just regular talks. Arthur had become friends with Alfred (Matthew was easy to befriend, but also easy to forget) without him noticing. And by the next year, Arthur was head-over-heels for the stupid boy.

Arthur flipped through his photo album absently and thought about what he saw yesterday. That moment seemed too intimate to be between brothers. Why had Matthew shook so badly? Physically he didn't look injured (Alfred was the only one injured when he came into school the next day) and yet he trembled as if he was beaten mercilessly. Or as if he had been bullied multiple times before. And then there was how Alfred comforted him. Arthur didn't have the best brotherly relationships, but he knew of families who did and brothers most definitely wouldn't comfort each other that way. Alfred had acted more like a parent comforting their child or...

_Or like lovers._

Arthur shook the thought out of his head. No, that couldn't be right. There had to be another answer. The blog he was reading was getting to him. There wasn't any kind of relationship like that between them. It was just his imagination. He didn't want the idea in his head. It caused his chest to burn with jealousy. That little voice continued to nag at the back of his head.

_What if they _are_ lovers? What if they love each other? What if you don't have a chance? What if Alfred and Matthew are actually America and Canada?  
_

Arthur froze. How had his mind jumped to that conclusion? Why would he even _think_ that? Arthur buried his face in his arms. _I need to stop reading that blog for a while. My mind is trying to fool me. Get a hold of yourself, Arthur._

* * *

"_Ich bin es diese Scheiße satt._" Gilbert muttered to himself as he and Arthur sat underneath a tree together during their P.E. class. Arthur was paying attention mostly to Alfred and Kiku, who were playing a game of basketball together in a one-on-one match in another class that was also outside today. Alfred had decided to strip of his over-shirt into just an undershirt that was by this point soaked to his skin like a second layer and showed off the shape of his form –muscles and all. Arthur kept himself from sighing in appreciation at the sight. He envied the younger boy's muscles. He could never achieve them. He was built for speed and not lifting weights.

He turned to Gilbert, only comprehending that he had cursed. "What did you say?"

"I said I'm sick of this shit!" Gilbert growled. "They're keeping secrets from us."

"I've realized this." Arthur stated. Now that Gilbert was frustrated, things were going to progress, he knew. But that wasn't really a good thing.

"I want to find out what they're talking about behind our backs!" Arthur sighed softly. He understood Gilbert's frustration. He just didn't know how to go about it. He didn't want to spy on them. It wasn't right.

"Hm…"

"Hello." Arthur and Gilbert turned to see Kiku standing behind them, leaning down slightly on the hill. His face was coated with sweat and his shirt stuck to him in places. Arthur took a moment to appreciate his old boyfriend. "Would either of you have a towel?"

"Yeah, here." Gilbert handed him the towel he had beside him that he would've used as a sweat-rag had they actually exercised yet. Kiku thanked him and wiped his face and neck. "Actually, Kiku, I want to know what it is you four have been talking about behind our backs." Gilbert said bluntly. Arthur hadn't expected him to come right out with it the way he had.

Kiku paused and looked at the two of them. "…What are you talking about?"

"Don't pretend like you don't know, Kiku. I mean that you, Matt, Alfred, and Nicole have all been talking about secrets behind our backs and that's not right. We want to know the secret."

Arthur could see that Kiku felt a little stressed by the accusation. Kiku took in a slow, deep breath through his nose. "I don't believe it is my place to say."

"What do you mean?" Arthur inquired.

"I mean," Kiku sat down next to Arthur –a little closer than in a friendly way with their arms touching, but Arthur didn't mind-"that it is neither mine nor Nicole secret to share. It is Alfred and Matthew's."

"So what are you saying?" Gilbert asked, frowning.

"I am saying that you would need to ask either Alfred or Matthew if you want to know what it is we have been discussing."

"If you cannot tell us what it is, then can you tell us why you've been discussing it so much? Surely it's not _that_ compelling of a secret?" Arthur said.

"Actually it really is quite compelling, but it is more Nicole and I trying to convince the two of them that their secret isn't all that bad and that they should tell you." Kiku smiled softly. "I think you two would be quite surprised."

"Is it that bad to them?" Gilbert asked.

Kiku nodded. "They're…ashamed of it, you could say. They're afraid to tell you."

"Why? They can trust us."

"Hm." Kiku stood. "I must head back. Alfred was only using the restroom." Arthur and Gilbert nodded. "Ah, Gilbert, have you read the blog yet?"

"_Nein._"

"You need to." He then turned and left them. Arthur and Gilbert looked at each other. It was strange for Kiku to demand things.

"I suppose we'll have to ask them ourselves." Arthur began.

"Yeah, but that seems rude and awkward. You don't just ask people what their secrets are. Even if we _are_ close." Gilbert mumbled.

"Then we'll have to wait."

"Yeah."

A silence stretched between them for a time before Arthur asked, "Do you want to play tennis?"

"_Ja_."

* * *

**Entry 29**

**It continued for a while, me visiting Canada, but it was tiring. I had to go there and back all in one night. I would have to travel in the dark without a flashlight sometimes. It was really scary.**

_**America is scared of ghosts.**_

**Don't say things like that! You'll ruin my rep! Anyway it got to the point that I decided to pop the question that had been running through my head for a while. But first I have to explain something. See, have I ever written that Canada and I are spoiled? We grew up getting whatever we wanted from our respective parents. New computer? Sure! Video games? How many? That kind of stuff. But I didn't really appreciate it. I saved half of my allowance each week and told Canada to start doing the same. I had a plan. **

**A few months after I started that plan I finally asked Canada.**

_**We were lying on my bed one night after some…activities and were relaxing, just staring at the ceiling. America had sighed next to me and randomly asked, "Hey, why don't we run away and live together?" I had sat up in shock. We couldn't do that. How could we do that? We weren't even fifteen yet. But America insisted.**_

"**Think about it." I had said. "We could live by our own rules together. We wouldn't need anybody else! Just us! Together! We have enough money!" But Canada was worried about jobs and making more money. I had money in my account. We would use that. He still wasn't sure, but after another month he gave in. In the middle of the night we ran away together.**

* * *

**Entry 30**

**(Holy crap, guys. So many followers!)**

_**It was scary running away. The future was suddenly scary. How would we know what would happen? Would we die? Would the cops find us? What if they did? How would we get more money? Who would allow two children to rent a house? **_

_**But at the same time it was exciting. It was just America and I, holding hands and running or riding a bus, or climbing trees, whatever we wanted. Nobody could stop us. We didn't need our parents.**_

**For the next few days we had to rely on living in a hotel room as we searched for a house. We had left our state and lived in Pennsylvania (it was a hell of a feat to get there, I'll tell ya!). It was a big state. Who could possibly find us? And eventually we found a house. I promised the home owner that I would work for her and she would allow us to live there on rent.**

_**It was easy. I would do the housework and America would do the actual work. I can cook and I like cleaning. America was more of a manual labor type of guy. So we left that to each other. Everything was working out perfectly. Until the summer ended. I wanted to go to school and finish up. But how could we? We would have to fake it. We said that our parents were dead and we were emancipated. We got in somehow.**_

**Personally I think it's because the principal was this grandpa (but he seriously looks like he's in his thirties) was taking care of two grandsons our age (who are also twins) and so he pitied us. I love that old geezer. He's the first real adult that we felt that we could trust.**

* * *

**To **_**Lunar Iris**_

**America: Sorry it took so long to respond! Haven't really been responding to these…Thanks for the concerns. It really was a great experience to see my brother again. It's like…God, it's hard to explain. It was like everything was right with the world again.**

**Canada: Sorry about making you cry. A lot of people seem to do that. Please don't cry. **

A/N: Woo sorry this took so long. I actually had a portion of it done; I just didn't know how to go about it. And now I need to do a chapter for A Pirate's Life, but I can't think of anything! *slams head against the wall* Damn senioritis!


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: For the sake of the story, please just work with my OC's codename. OTL I know it's not that good.

Soon there will be less entries and more actual storyline.

* * *

**Entry 31**

_**Entering a new school –and high school at the same time- was as terrifying as it was thrilling. Nobody there knew us. Our parents had no clue where we were. We were free for the first time and we were taking the step into adulthood together, hand-in-hand. We didn't have all of the same classes, but we were thankful for that. This year we were focused on finding new friends. We hadn't tried to get any in our old school. It was just the two of us during that time. Now we would gather friends.**_

**Luckily our school is nice! I had friends in no time. Um…for the sake of the story I guess I'll have to give codenames for them as well considering they're gonna be popping up here a lot.**

_**Within a couple of weeks America had already made friends or at least chatted with many of the kids from his classes. At lunch I sat with him and I was able to talk to them as well. I was generally ignored by them though because of how quiet I am –thanks to my mother's care- so it wasn't as fun for me. That is, until Prussia.**_

**Prussia was the first of our now-official group of friends to sit with us. The guy's always been cool even though he's kind of annoying. He's loud and egotistical, but the guy was always talking to not just me but Canada as well, and that was props to him.**

_**The next person was a girl that we've dubbed for this Moon who came over to us saying she was one of Prussia's friends –which she was- and asked if she could sit with us too. We let her and we easily became friends with her, although I had started to get nervous by this point. America and I held hands under the table for comfort. New people were entering our world. And they just kept coming.**_

**Next was Japan. He's this quiet little guy who was dating Moon. He's older than us by two years. At first he just kind of sat down and was really quiet but after I got him talking about video games we quickly became friends. He's one of my best friends! But the last to come was the best –England. The guy looked like he was pissed when he came over and appeared that he sat against his own will.**

_**Moon assured us he was just sulking.**_

**But we discovered he's just like that. But it wasn't long before we had him talking (fighting, arguing, chatting, bitching, take your pick) to me and Canada. We had finally found a strong group of friends that we were accepted in. We couldn't have been happier.**

* * *

Arthur refused to accept the thoughts running through his head. It was all coincidental. America and Canada were not his friends Alfred and Matthew. Yes, the recent descriptions seemed similar –and the countries that represented their friends were definitely their homelands (except for Nicole, but she was American for the most part) - but they couldn't possibly be one in the same. Such a thing would've been obvious, right? About Alfred and Matthew loving each other –about them having a brother complex.

But at the same time Arthur had begun to notice the way the brothers treated each other. They seemed to need to have constant knowledge of where the other was or else they begin to panic a little. Alfred and Matthew sat next to each other every chance they received. And then there was the incident with the bullies Arthur had witnessed.

Arthur shook his head furiously. _No! Stop it! They're just two brothers that happen to be close and don't live with their parents…and get upset when their parents are mentioned…and…_He froze in his thoughts as he remembered how Alfred had acted towards the talk of parents –asking about Arthur's family relationships and then closing off suddenly and harshly when Arthur tried to get the same information from him. He stared at his computer screen in pure shock, his breathing coming a little faster. _Oh my Lord, America and Canada are Alfred and Matthew._

He put his face into his hands. Arthur wasn't going to deny himself –he knew that he was a genius. He knew that his analysis deduction skills were second to none. He could deny what his mind had come up with already long ago the moment he became suspicious. He knew all along but he was too afraid to accept it. It wasn't that he had a problem with Alfred and Matthew doing…things together (although admittedly that was part of it –common sense told him it was just _wrong_) but it was more if Alfred and Matthew were together, what hope did Arthur have? He couldn't compete with a brother that had been with Alfred since birth. And he couldn't easily walk up to Alfred and tell him his love was wrong and try to seduce him. Alfred would hate him forever. Arthur had no chance to be together with Alfred.

He pushed away from his computer and closed it. He didn't want to look at the blog anymore that night. Instead he crawled into bed and closed his eyes, his heart already broken having realized that he had never even had a shot.

* * *

For three days Arthur didn't go onto that website. He couldn't. He couldn't bring himself to do it. He couldn't bear to read how much Canada and America –no, Alfred and Matthew- loved each other. But on the weekend some masochistic urge overcame him and he trudged back to the computer and onto the site. _Surely, _he thought, _this is the best way for me to understand Alfred without asking him. I recall Alfred said that they update it every two weeks or so after all._

And so Arthur decided to catch up on what he missed.

**Entry 32**

**Canada and one of our followers brought this up recently but people have been saying we have a brother complex. Upon looking it up I think that it would be stronger than that, but you guys are right. And we researched more and discovered we don't just have a brother complex. Because of all of the torment we went through in the past, we both can't stand to be away from each other for long periods of time without starting to hyperventilate or have a break down (discovered that the hard way) so we have to keep in contact with each other by calling or whatever.**

_**There's also my inability to speak. Because of my mamma's…rampages I often didn't speak and eventually it became a habit. I become so quiet at times that I just seem to blend into the background. People don't notice me. It's difficult for me because it happens naturally when I'm too quiet. It was a self-defense mechanism to hide from my mamma.**_

**The reason why we brought this up was because half a year later or so during Christmas Break Canada and I were only thinking about seeing our friends again whenever we had just hung out with them and wanted to go back. Specifically two people. To our shock, we discovered that we had fallen out of love with each other.**

_**It hurt. The discovery that such a thing could happen so naturally without our notice was terrifying. It was like the hand I was holding just slipped away without my notice even though we were right next to each other. All we could do was stare at each other. America wasn't my other half. He wasn't the love of my life. And that couldn't be possible in my mind. We had always been made for each other. And yet here we were standing as if looking at a stranger.**_

**We both started to freak out and we clung to each other sobbing. This couldn't be happening. We couldn't fall out of love with each other. I could never replace Canada with someone else. It felt like we were desperately trying to shove two ceramic pieces back together that just broke the more we tried. Eventually –hours later- it completely shattered and we calmed down. We talked things out in quiet voices.**

_**We still loved each other, we decided, but we also cared for someone else. We had crushes. If we had crushes, we figured, it meant we weren't completely in love with each other. America and I only loved each other but were not in love with each other anymore. We both accepted that.**_

_**And yet even typing it now still causes my heart to ache with longing.**_

* * *

**Entry 33**

**After our acceptance of our situation –none of our complexes or issues were gone but we didn't kiss like we used to and we didn't do anything sexual anymore- we began to timidly explore these new feelings for other people. We felt like we had just stepped into a new world and out of the bubble Canada and I had created for just the two of us. We stepped carefully though and retreated back to each other in fear. It was actually kind of funny how we had acted, now that I think about it.**

_**So the year passed and we moved into our sophomore year. Our small group of friends was really close now. We had fit in perfectly and we were often invited to hang out with them. America and I got separate jobs at a place other than the landlady's house. We were growing up. Things were maturing for us. We were maturing.**_

**By this point in time Canada and I had come to terms with our feelings towards these people. Meeting so many others and seeing their relationships –honestly watching Japan and Moon in a successful heterosexual relationship restored our hope in humanity a bit- helped stimulate our own feelings. Canada and I, while not letting go of each other, wanted to reach out and bring someone else into our world. We wanted to be in relationship other than each other. And I had already fallen head-over-heels for my friend.**

_**It took much longer for me to actually fall for Prussia. It was difficult with his attitude and oftentimes it occurred to me that maybe I just like him because of his similarities to America. So I began searching for the differences. And it was the differences that made me fall for Prussia.**_

**The only question we had to deal with now was whether or not they liked us. It's a fear that rips our hearts. It was nothing like dating Canada. In this case if you confess and fail you may lose your friend. They could reject you. The bond was so less…trusting when it was with someone you know doesn't have to stay with you. Canada and I could never leave each other. It's as terrifying as it is a little thrilling. It was a challenge and I loved challenges. **

* * *

Arthur was once again left staring at his screen. Canada and America didn't love each other in that way anymore. Alfred and Matthew were both in love with other people. Matthew loved Gilbert –lucky bastard- and Alfred…Alfred loved somebody else. But _who_? He never said. Arthur held out hope that it was him though. He called him a friend. He could rule out Kiku and Nicole since Alfred appeared to be completely homosexual. Arthur could still win him.

His hope thoroughly restored he closed his laptop and called up Kiku and asked him and Nicole to meet him in the park they often met in. He then left the house as the affirmation was given and he arrived first. He looked up at the couple as they approached his swing.

"What'cha call us out for?" Nicole asked, taking a swing next to him. Kiku leaned against the swing's pole next to Arthur.

"I've figured it out." Arthur stated, swinging lowly, not looking at them. The two of them waited for him to go on. "Alfred and Matthew are America and Canada. Respectively." Again they didn't respond but they were focusing on him heavily. Nicole opened her mouth to say something but stopped. Arthur understood she didn't want to give away any secrets she probably promised the twins she would keep. "You don't have to agree; I already know it's true. It's why you two wanted me to read the blog, is it not?"

"Have you finished it?" Kiku asked instead of answering.

"I've almost caught up." Kiku nodded.

"Your assumptions are correct…but I still believe you should let Alfred and Matthew tell you their secret for themselves." He said.

"Alfred already knows I read the blog. He didn't say anything." Kiku didn't respond.

"What do you think of them now that you know?" Nicole leaned forward to look into Arthur's eyes.

Arthur considered it a moment. "I…don't really agree with their relationship of loving each other in a physical way, but I can understand and accept why they did. I'm not so much disgusted as I am surprised because I would have never thought Alfred and Matthew would be like that…but that's all."

Kiku and Nicole nodded approvingly. "What will you do about it now?" Kiku asked.

"I'm…going to study this more and catch up with the blog. And then I will talk to Alfred and Matthew." Arthur stood. "Thank you for coming out here. Would you like to come back to my house?"

* * *

A/N: So yeah. Expect more story than entries in the upcoming chapters.

REVIEW~~Please?


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Hello, everyone! I'm skipping ahead in the blog entries again. I'm doing this because I can't keep thinking of little thoughts and events that happened to Alfred and Matthew that aren't of importance any longer. I need to skip them and have Arthur completely caught up with the blog in order to progress the storyline further. Please bear with me!**

* * *

Arthur took a deep breath before he stepped into his classroom on Monday morning. Since Saturday night when he had discovered the truth of Alfred and Matthew's lives he had been rapidly reading the blog entries during Sunday alone –in between a class project and his chores as well as his paperwork as the class president- and had finally caught up. However, there hadn't been much he had learnt from it besides a few facts, which disappointed him.

Arthur learnt that Alfred and Matthew –by this point in time- still kissed. They didn't kiss in a sexual way, though. It was more in a family way. Another thing is that Matthew wanted to get close to Gilbert but he thought for sure that Gilbert did not like him and actually liked a girl named Elizabeta. In truth in the blog her name is Hungary but Arthur knew that since they chose the names based on orientation and based on the description of her it had to be Elizabeta. Arthur knew he would have to hint at Gilbert to make his feelings a bit more obvious to the shy boy.

On the other hand of the spectrum Arthur still had no clue about Alfred. He had never mentioned at all the target of his feelings except for the fact that it was a male and his friend. Arthur had tried to guess who it was but there were hardly any clues there. There were multiple English people at the school. It frustrated him. He wanted to know. He supposed that the only way he would be able to figure it out was by studying Alfred's interaction with all of the others.

Arthur entered the classroom with determination. He was determined to get his answers. He was also going to talk to Gilbert. Obviously Matthew was completely in love with him. But should he tell Gilbert to step up his flirtations or tell him directly? It didn't take long to come up with his answer as he found Gilbert and grabbed him before dragging him into a more secluded area of the room.

"What the hell? What do you want so early?" Gilbert yawned. He was never that big of a morning person. They had to wake up too early to go to school.

"You should ask Matthew out." Arthur said bluntly, causing Gilbert to pause and blush a little, the romantically awkward boy he was.

"What? Why should I? I'll just get rejected!"

"You won't. I'm positive that Matthew likes you back. I've been keeping tabs on them."

"How would you know?"

Arthur shook his head. "Just trust me. Try it." Gilbert frowned, not looking happy, but nodded.

"If you fuck things up I'm going to fuck you up. I've been trying for this for too long."

Arthur ignored Gilbert's threats. Gilbert walked off then to wait for Matthew and most likely to build up his courage. Arthur smirked a little. If Gilbert confessed today and Matthew agreed to go out with him then that was one less thing to worry about. Matthew would be with Gilbert more –hopefully- and Arthur would be able to spend more time around Alfred without giving himself away. He also really hoped that his friend succeeded considering he had gone after Matthew for even longer than Arthur had for Alfred.

But that left Arthur's own predicament. What was he supposed to do to approach Alfred on this matter? He sat down at his desk and waited. Kiku and Nicole showed up first, though, and came up to him. "Gilbert looks nervous." Nicole stated, pleasantly confused. "Did something happen already?"

"He's going to confess to Matthew." Arthur said in a low voice in order to keep it a secret.

"Really?" Kiku asked.

"That's great!" Nicole cheered and smiled. "Kiku, we should totally catch the confession on film to show them later!"

"A-Ah, we shall see." Arthur knew the boy well enough to know that he would try. "And what of you, Arthur? Are you going to?"

Arthur looked away to avoid their eyes, blushing a tiny bit. "No, I won't. There's not enough evidence to point out that it's me he likes." Nicole opened her mouth while he wasn't looking to speak but Kiku touched her arm and shook her head.

"But…" She tried to say.

"We'll have to try from the other angle." Her boyfriend said. Nicole sighed and nodded. Arthur raised an eyebrow at the exchange. However he didn't get to question them as Alfred –because Matthew had been caught by Gilbert- entered the room.

"G'morning guys!" He chirped. Arthur's heart thudded in his chest. He was confused. He would've thought that after his discovery of Alfred and Matthew's secret he would've thought of them differently. But he didn't. His feelings and thoughts towards them have hardly changed. The only thing that had really changed was now he was becoming the attacker. He wasn't waiting around any longer.

Arthur felt himself smiling as he watched Alfred. He couldn't wait for the day he would be able to kiss that loudmouth.

* * *

Arthur was walking down the hallways after lunch by himself –his class was in a different direction than all of the others' classrooms- when he heard a familiar call of his annoying nickname and saw Alfred run up to him. "What are you doing here? You need to get to class." Arthur immediately scolded.

Alfred stuck his tongue out at him. "Jeez, don't be such a stick-up-the-ass." Arthur spluttered indignantly. "A-anyway, I wanted to talk to you about something." Arthur stopped his up-coming yelling about the insult as he saw Alfred looked a little embarrassed. He was rather cute like that.

"Yes?" He prompted.

Alfred grinned and rubbed the back of his head. "Can you meet me in Mr. Rome's classroom after school? I want to talk to you."

Arthur's heart began to beat faster but he carefully hid his excitement. "Whatever for? Can't you just tell me here and now? I still have to do my paperwork for school and I need to stop by my club."

"No, I can't tell you now! It's a-a secret, you know? And I'll just wait until after you're done with your work! Just text me when you're done, okay? I need to go buy something anyway." Arthur loved seeing Alfred so terribly embarrassed. It made Arthur wonder exactly what this was about.

"Alright. I'll do that." He confirmed and Alfred cheered.

"Okay! I'll see you then! I've got to hurry!" He turned and ran off.

"You're going to be late!" Arthur called and Alfred gave him a wave as he left. He had to wait until his next block when he saw Kiku and decided to ask him about it. "Have you heard anything from him? Is he going to tell me _that_?" He asked, nervous himself.

Kiku smiled softly at his friend. "Well, there are three possible things he could tell you. His secret, he could be confessing to you, or something neither of us know of."

Arthur froze. "I…I hadn't even considered the possibility that Alfred may confess to me." Internally Arthur flailed. How was he supposed to react if that happened? Obviously he would accept but just the thought of such a scene was embarrassing! He turned red at the thought.

"Perhaps you should also consider the other possibilities before you pass out." Kiku suggested teasingly, seeing his friend's red face and panicked look.

"R-Right." What if it was the first option? Bloody hell, he didn't know how to react to that either. He couldn't just tell Alfred that he _knew_. But then again, Alfred already knew that he read the blog. Perhaps he was waiting to tell him? It was rather obvious who America and Canada were if one just paid enough attention.

He didn't bother to think about the third option. But Arthur sincerely hoped it was the second option.

That was why a few hours later Arthur had to resist the urge to slam his head on his desk as he was doing his paperwork. He couldn't concentrate. His thoughts flew in a circle focusing on Alfred. He just wanted to get down to Mr. Rome's class and go see what Alfred wanted. He was nervous. He was excited. He was hopeful. He was so terribly scared. But he wanted to do this.

He scowled at his paperwork. Why had he even bothered trying to do these? Especially when he knew he could do them tomorrow? He had practically cock-blocked himself. He wondered if he should just drop all of this and leave. But he couldn't just leave the papers lying about. So he set to work putting them up at the moment, keeping a straight face for any of the other members of the student council that came in. He damned himself for his personality.

Finally Arthur finished and hurried to the classroom where the Black Magic Club met. Inside he found Lukas and Vladimir reading a few books that Arthur recognized as herb books. He greeted them. "Where were you?" Lukas asked.

"Yeah, aren't you supposed to be the leader?" Vladimir asked. He tilted his head curiously as Arthur grabbed his cloak and folded it up before putting it into his backpack.

"I'm sorry, gents, but I'm in a hurry. We'll need to reschedule the love potion we were going to make."

"To when?" Vladimir asked. "We need to start on it soon if we're going to sell anything around Valentine's Day."

"Yes, and you know the potion takes a month to brew." Lukas agreed.

"I know, I know. On Wednesday we will." Arthur promised. They really needed to get started on the love potions. February was a few months away. They needed to cook for a month and they needed to make enough for everybody –because Arthur had no doubt in his mind they would be popular- in the school. And they only had one cauldron. Cauldrons were bloody expensive –or at least the good ones.

He said his goodbyes to them and left to head over to Mr. Rome's classroom and entered it. The classroom was completely empty except for what appeared to be a bandana on the table. He frowned and picked it up wondering whose it was. He put it down and pulled out his cell phone and text Alfred (he was the first on his list which in _no_ way made Arthur giddy) that he was in the classroom.

He waited for a few minutes and then felt his phone vibrate and he unlocked it. **Great! Not on campus. Be there in a few. Put on the blindfold and face away from the door**_._ **–Hero** The message said. Arthur frowned, wondering why he had to do that and sat on a desk facing the windows instead of the door. He then texted as to why he had to do such things. A few moments later he received his reply. **Because it's a surprise and I don't want you to see! –Hero**. Arthur gave up. Alfred was ridiculous so it was better to go along with whatever he was doing. So he grabbed the blindfold and tied it over his eyes (he did _not_ immediately recognize the scent on it as Alfred's cologne) and waited.

If Alfred was telling him to blindfold himself, then obviously it wasn't either of Kiku's first options. Why would he be asked to do such things when the first two options could easily just be told to him? Alfred must have something he wanted to show him, but what could it possibly be? He couldn't fathom it. There weren't any special events coming up –besides maybe the winter dance, but that was another two months away- and as far as Arthur knew Alfred hadn't acquired anything that would be worthy of it being considered a surprise or a secret.

His growing curiosity and musings were interrupted as he heard the door to the classroom open. His heart –already beating rather fast- sped into a gallop. He couldn't wait to know what Alfred had in store for him. "It's about bloody time you arrived." He said, pretending to be more agitated than he really was. "You kept me waiting."

Alfred didn't respond which made Arthur confused. Alfred always talked every chance he got. Why wasn't he speaking now? He moved to lift off his blindfold when suddenly he found lips on his own. His eyes widened behind the blindfold in shock before he sighed against the lips and kissed back. This is what he had been waiting for? Well he was glad he'd waited. Alfred's kisses were amazing. He couldn't resist wrapping his arms around his neck and leaning into the kiss.

However, he was brought back to his senses by two things. The kiss pricked his chin a little bit. It was obviously stubble. Did Alfred forget to shave? No, Arthur knew that his face was shaven. But then why did he feel stubble? And then there were his arms. The hair was too long. Alfred's hair wasn't this long. And then the cologne hit him and he pulled back sharply. This sickly sweet cologne was not Alfred's. It was too feminine.

He ripped off his blindfold and gaped for half a second in shock. "Francis!" He yelled, his hot-headed personality immediately switching his good mood into fury. Francis chuckled and gave a shrug.

"Hello, _mi ami_." He said, grinning.

"You bastard!" Arthur swung a punch at him but the boy dodged it. "How dare you kiss me!"

"How could I not?" Francis asked the seething boy. "You were blindfolded and waiting. I couldn't resist le opportunity."

"I wasn't waiting for _you_!" Arthur screeched.

"Oh? Then who?" The English boy flushed.

"None of your bloody business! Go the fuck away!"

Francis shrugged. "Very well, I will." Arthur followed him to the door and wiped his mouth on the back of his hand. Francis exited the classroom and was part way down the hall when Arthur noticed a rose on the ground. He picked it up.

"You forgot a rose, frog!" He yelled to his vice-president.

Francis paused and turned, appearing confused and dug into his pockets. "It is not mine!" He called back. "I only brought rose petals with me today, not a full flower!" He tossed a few rose petals in the air and posed to accentuate exactly what he meant before leaving. Arthur scowled at him and how idiotic the French were before he went back into the classroom and shut the door. He hopped back onto the desk and waited, checking his phone for messages. But he hadn't received any new ones.

He sighed and looked over the red rose. It was gorgeous with its petals fully opened and exposing the beauty of the whole flower. It still had a little bit of water on it which suggested that it was store-bought. He stroked the petals gently, breathing in the scent. It was perfect. He wondered who could've forgotten such a lovely flower. Perhaps a boy who had planned on confessing? But then why would he drop it? Maybe he was rejected. Arthur pitied the boy if it was true. Rejection was a horrible feeling. He would take the flower instead and care for it. It was better than it dying a lonely death on the floor here in the school.

Arthur put back on the blindfold and waited. Alfred should be arriving soon with his surprise. He would wait impatiently, his once good mood more dampened upon since Francis. He scowled at the kiss. How could he not recognize it wasn't Alfred immediately? And speaking of Alfred, it had been a good fifteen minutes. What was taking him? Arthur looked at his phone. It was nearing five. School had let out around three and an hour and a half had been spent futilely on paperwork. He'd been here for half an hour already waiting for Alfred.

_I'll wait a bit longer. _Arthur thought, his hopes becoming a little desperate. But as five-thirty rolled around, they were even more so. He promised to wait a bit longer. _Surely he's caught up in something. That's it. He'll text if he can't make it._ Arthur reassured himself. But then six rolled around and Arthur had to accept the facts. Alfred wasn't coming. He frowned unhappily and disappointed, feeling stood-up. He grabbed his bag, rose, and the blindfold and stormed out of the classroom, pulling out his phone and sending an angry text to Alfred wondering where the hell he was. He then called up Kiku.

"_Moshi moshi._" Kiku greeted.

"He didn't fucking show up!" Arthur exclaimed, leaving the school and getting into his car. "He told me he was on his way and then he didn't bloody show up!"

"A-Ah." Kiku stuttered, no doubt shocked by the sudden yelling.

Arthur took an angry inhale before letting it out slowly. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to yell. It's just…fuck, I had thought…"

"We know, Arthur." Nicole called from the background. Arthur realized he was on speakerphone. "Tell us what happened." So Arthur told them all that had happened, raging at the part where Francis had shown up and stolen a kiss from him and raging even more at the fact that Alfred never showed up.

"And on top of that he still hasn't text back with an explanation!" Arthur finished, looking at his phone as he reached a stop sign and seeing that there weren't any messages.

"I'm sure there's an explanation." Kiku assured Arthur. Arthur heard him a little farther away from the phone. "Call Alfred please? Or Matthew?"

"Already on it." Arthur heard Nicole say. He sighed loudly and waited with them silently and arrived at his house. "Voicemail." Nicole said. "I'm going to try again." Arthur knew that the girl always called three times in a row before stopping and so he waited. On the third call Nicole gasped. "It's Matt!" She said. "Hey, Matt…Alfred can't answer? Why?" Arthur parked his car in his driveway and waited with bated breath. "…Okay, I see? Well, if you ever want to tell me the truth I'm all ears." Arthur frowned and he heard Kiku curse softly under his breath. "I'm not trying to mean." Nicole assured Matthew. "I'm just saying…Well, we're his friends too as well as yours…Alright, I understand. Tell Alfred that I hope he feels better! …Okay, bye!"

"What was that about?" Arthur asked immediately, pulling on his bag and traveling into the house to go upstairs to his bedroom.

"Matt said that Alfred's not feeling good which I think is a lie. He sounded stressed." Arthur could practically hear Nicole's frown. "I think something happened to Alfred but I wished they'd tell us. They still don't trust us enough…"

Arthur placed his stuff down into his room and got a vase to put the rose in, giving it water. "Maybe we'll find out tomorrow." He suggested.

"I hope so." She was worried.

"We'll discuss it tomorrow. Nicole, dinner should be done soon." Kiku said.

"Right, okay. We've got to go, Arthur!" She said.

"Alright. Good bye, then."

"_Sayonara._"

"Bye!" Arthur placed his phone on his desk and gazed at his rose as the call ended. He was worried. He hoped that nothing ill had befallen Alfred.

* * *

**A/N: Haha, I feel like I always make Francis the bad guy, but Francis and Arthur have a very love/hate relationship so I feel that Francis would definitely do such a thing. I wonder if you guys can guess what happened to Alfred? It's pretty obvious if you think about it. Expect angsty-ness~**

**Also, sorry it took so long to get this out. What with my one and two-shot I got caught up in other shit. ┐('****；****)┌ Sorry. Anyway, please review! I'm rather shocked that there aren't all that many chapters and already there're over, like, 50 reviews. I wanna hit 100 in this story! Before it's over too! So Review~**


	9. Chapter 9

Arriving at school the next morning Arthur expected an apology from Alfred as well as a better explanation. He, Kiku, and Nicole all knew that the younger twin had been lying to cover for his brother, they just didn't know why. Was Alfred actually sick? Well Arthur would confront Matthew until his questions were answered.

He entered the classroom to find Gilbert, who saw him and grinned widely. Arthur felt dread enter his system and walked over to him. "You were right, Lord Eyebrows. Mattie _did_ like me back!" Gilbert said immediately.

Arthur scowled at the name. "Oh really?"

"Yeah! So now we're finally together! It's great, right?"

"Sure."

Gilbert noticed his sourpuss mood and leaned over to look at him. "What's with you?"

Arthur's scowl deepened, watching the door. "Oh nothing. Just that Alfred was going to tell me something –I had _hoped_ it was a confession- but he never showed up!"

Gilbert patted his back in sympathy. "You can ask him today."

"I know."

But Alfred didn't show up that day. And for that matter, not even Matthew did. They had both skipped school. And it was the same the day after. Arthur was shocked by this. They were avoiding them! It was so obvious! He wanted to yell at them, but they wouldn't answer the phones and nobody knew where they lived. They had never been over to the twins' house. They were left waiting.

Finally on the third day Matthew showed up, but with no older brother in tow. Arthur's head shot up upon seeing him, but he didn't rush the boy. He knew not to do something like that. Gilbert didn't, however, and rushed over to him. "Birdie, you're alright! What happened to you? Weren't we supposed to go on a date yesterday?"

Matthew looked away. Arthur saw his eyes were a light red and he looked exhausted. "I'm sorry, Gilbert." He said softly. "Something important came up."

Gilbert's voice softened, sensing something was wrong with his boyfriend. "It's alright. I don't mind." Matthew gave him a small grateful smile and the two walked over to join Kiku, Arthur, and Nicole.

"Hello." He greeted them.

"Hello." Arthur said and with hesitation jumped in. "Matthew, whatever happened? You look…horrid."

"Yeah and where's Alfred?" Nicole added, seeing as Arthur had started.

Matthew didn't say anything for a long moment. "He's…not feeling well. I've been taking care of him for the past three nights." Arthur swallowed nervously.

"Is it serious?" Gilbert asked.

"It's…yeah, it's serious. He didn't want me to come to school today, but I have to get all of our homework and stuff." Matthew said.

"P-Perhaps we can go with you to your house? We'll help you with the homework?" Arthur suggested hopefully.

"No. Alfred doesn't want to see anyone." And with that the conversation ended. Matthew refused to answer any more questions and the class was about to start. Arthur was going mad with confusion. He wanted to know what was wrong with Alfred. He wanted to see him. He wasn't even angry at him anymore. He just wanted to make sure the boy was okay.

* * *

Arthur lulled on his bed, rather bored as he gazed at the canopy of his bed and twirling his wand idly. He had finished his homework but at the same time he had nothing better to do. His family was out without him. He didn't really care. He was being kept company by his friend Minty, but she had left a little while ago on one of her random spur-of-the-moments. He had been texting Nicole but she hadn't responded in a long while. Arthur glanced at the time he had sent the last text. Nearly half an hour now. He sighed and was about to put his phone down when he felt it buzz in his hand. He lifted it and saw his newest message: **READ AMERICA AND CANADA'S BLOG NOW!**

He blinked at it and got up quickly to rush over to his computer. Finally maybe he would know what was up with Alfred and Matthew. He placed the phone to the side and clicked onto the site before going to the most recent update. It was all Canada. _"__**Something terrible happened.**_" Was the first line. Arthur froze at the line before he read on.

* * *

_**Something terrible happened.**_

_**America won't be talking in this update. He can't. He's in no shape to do it. He's too busy quietly sobbing on the bed, trying not to alert me to the fact he was awake. He didn't want me to update, but I couldn't deny our followers. We already know that our friends read our blog –I don't think Prussia does, though- so I don't feel as guilty. I can't tell them out loud what happened so I'll tell them through this. Maybe then HE will see what he's done to my brother.**_

_**It was a couple days back and the most amazing thing and the absolute worst thing happened to us. That day Prussia confessed to being in love with me. I couldn't believe it. Prussia actually loved me back. I couldn't have been happier. He looked so relieved too, as if he didn't believe that I would actually accept. Well, he's a bit stupid so I guess it's alright.**_

_**But I didn't tell America. I didn't get the chance to. I wanted to tell him that day but he was nervous as anything. He was going to confess to his love that day too. So I held back until later. Then the two of us could be happy together about all of it.**_

_**That day I went home by myself because America stayed after school to confess to England. I was happy for him and I spent the whole time texting Prussia, making plans for another day. Our first date. Sometime later, though, I felt something was wrong. Not a minute later America burst through the door. I sat up on the couch in shock. His face was pale and he was trembling. I rushed over to him and he broke down into my arms. He cried his heart out. I didn't need to know what had happened. He had been rejected, our worst fear. I couldn't possibly tell him about Prussia now.**_

_**I held onto him as he sobbed and got out the broken pieces of what had occurred from him. He had been going to confess to England when he found him kissing another guy. I was shocked by who it was because I was sure England hated that guy. I felt fury flare up inside of me. How dare England do this to my brother! How dare he lie about being with someone else or not telling us about liking someone else? He had strung my brother along and then just dumped him onto the ground where I sat holding his shaking form. **_

_**But then all that anger was gone. It wasn't the time to be angry at England. My brother needed me. His heart was broken again. I cried with him, feeling his pain. "It's so unfair!" America cried. "Why is it that I can't be loved? I try my best! I try everything and I always end up kicked around!" **_

_**My heart broke for him. "But I love you!"**_

"_**I know." America leaned up and kissed me, desperately. "I know…please…" He pushed me to the floor and kissed me hard. I kissed back out of pure instincts, but my gut twisted a little. I was cheating on Prussia. But…I couldn't think of those things. I apologized to Prussia silently. I couldn't be in love with him when my brother couldn't love the one he did. He needed me and my brother was more important.**_

_**That night we had sex again for the first time in over a year.**_

_**But it wasn't fun. It wasn't the same. It didn't feel right and I knew America felt it too. He was using me as comfort, but I didn't mind. The only thing that killed me was the way he cried the whole time, his eyes shut tightly as he whispered England's name into the air sorrowfully as he thrust into me. He was imagining what he couldn't have and it killed him inside.**_

* * *

Arthur read the blog entry. He reread the blog entry. He did it one more time slowly just to make sure he had everything in place and he covered his mouth in horror, realizing everything. He understood now. Alfred was in love with him. He had planned on confessing that day in the classroom just like Arthur had thought. He had made him wear the blindfold so that he could surprise Arthur with the rose that he had probably left school and had painstakingly picked out just for him and that's why he took so long to get back. But he had seen Francis kiss Arthur and Arthur kissing Francis back. Horrified, he had dropped the flower and ran off.

Arthur looked over at the rose in the vase next to his computer. The beautiful rose that he loved. His heart was thudding painfully in his chest as his mind continued to decipher all that had occurred. Alfred had run home to Matthew, heartbroken, and they had sex while Alfred desperately imagined Arthur. Arthur had royally fucked things up for them.

He started crying, unable to help his crybaby tendencies. He had hurt Alfred over a mistake. He didn't love Francis. He loved Alfred. He wanted Alfred. But now he feared he had screwed things up for them. He had to fix it. He needed to talk to Alfred. But he knew if he was going to talk to Alfred, he needed to get through Matthew. And he knew that wouldn't be easy.

* * *

"Matthew, please." Arthur begged for the fifth time that day. His guilt was a rock inside of his chest and it was suffocating him. He needed to talk to Alfred. He needed to have everything forgiven. He couldn't lose Alfred.

Matthew –for the first time Arthur had ever seen- glared at him. "No." Arthur shivered. Matthew's voice was so icy. It felt like a snowstorm.

"I swear on my life that it was a misunderstanding! Honestly! I do _not_ like Francis or love him and he is most certainly _not_ my boyfriend!" Arthur pushed forward anyway.

"I don't care. As far as I'm concerned, you shouldn't see Alfred again." Matthew turned his head away.

Arthur gripped his arm a little. "What! But he's our friend! Matthew, you're overreacting!"

Matthew pulled away from him, his glare turning his eyes darker, and hissed, "I haven't seen my brother cry like that since we were forced apart. You know as well as I do –since you've read it- just how afraid Al and I were to fall in love with other people because we feared we would lose them. And you just made that nightmare a reality to my brother. Right now he's at home half of what he was because of you! As far as I'm concerned, you can just leave our lives right now!"

Arthur sat there, stunned, and felt his body go limp. Matthew was right. He had hurt Alfred in the worst of ways. He had taken his heart and ripped it apart. But it was all an accident. This wasn't meant to happen. It was a misunderstanding. He wanted to be the one to help put Alfred's heart back together, not Matthew. Alfred, he thought, was his. And it was his duty to help him.

"No…" He whispered hoarsely, trying not to let the tears in his eyes fall and gave Matthew a determined look. "I won't leave him. I need to tell him the truth. Matthew…I love him." Matthew stared at him blankly. Arthur pushed on. "I honestly do. I want to be with him. I swear to you, I won't hurt him any longer. Please, I need him. Let me apologize."

Matthew, for the longest time, was silent. The two stared at each other, their wills conflicting. They were reading each other and their determination. Arthur couldn't lose this battle of wills. Goddammit, if he could beat Alfred at this kind of thing, he sure as hell could beat his brother!

Matthew sighed, giving in and looking sad. "You want to come to my house to apologize?"

"Yes." Arthur nodded once.

"Fine."

* * *

After school Nicole and Kiku wanted to come along, but after Arthur shook his head they didn't put up a fight. They knew this was between the twins and Arthur so they laid back. "Tell us what happens, alright?" Nicole said, worried. Arthur could tell she was stressing.

"Yes." He said.

"We'll be at the park." Kiku assured him and the group split. Matthew rode in Arthur's car, directing him. Arthur knew he was nervous and against all of it. He didn't want to bring Arthur. But he did so anyway. "It's only because if by any chance you succeed, my brother will be happier." He had told Arthur. Arthur understood he wasn't lying, but he sensed there was something else there as well. He was smart enough to know that it probably had to do with Gilbert and Matthew's hidden relationship.

When Arthur pulled up at Matthew and Alfred's apartment, he was rather surprised by it. It was completely tiny and a little bit run-down. It looked like it had been patched up some. This hadn't really been mentioned in the blog. But then again, he recalled that Matthew and Alfred lived in a bachelor apartment together.

The two walked up the stairs and Matthew unlocked the door to open it. "Al? I'm back home now!" Arthur stepped inside and took off his shoes, looking around. There was a small tattered couch and television set in the middle of the room with a tiny kitchen to the left of the entryway. Arthur saw only three doors. He could assume what they were what with the one bed/one bath apartment. Alfred was through one of those doors.

He heard shuffling in one room but the door didn't open. Matthew sighed and turned to Arthur, pointing at the door. "He's in there, but I'll stay out here. If I think things are going south, I'm coming in there and throwing you out." Arthur suddenly understood exactly how these two were brothers.

"I understand." He whispered and nervously walked to the door. Upon opening it, he peeked inside. It was dark in the room with a computer on a small table on the other side of the room, its screen on a screensaver. There was a small double bed in the middle of the room and only one dresser with a lamp on it. A lump in the bed alerted Arthur to Alfred. He walked forward slowly and closed the door behind him, approaching the bed.

A voice grumbled out from the blankets. "Matt, I'm not hungry so you don't have to cook for me." Arthur stiffened. Alfred's voice was rough. He had been crying a lot, he knew. The boy was a wreck. He'd never turn down food.

"…I'm not here to cook for you, Alfred." Arthur saw the body under the blankets stiffen and Alfred sat up quickly to look at him. His eyes were wide and his face pale. There were tear streaks on his face from his red eyes. He was trembling.

"W-what….how did you get here?" He demanded, terrified. Arthur hated it. He approached Alfred and crawled onto the bed. Alfred back up until he was against the wall and Arthur sat directly in front of him, trapping him.

"You never showed up at the school when you promised me you had a surprise for me. I was waiting for quite a while and was rather disappointed you didn't show up." He started with his voice light and soft.

Alfred stared at him. "Well you were busy so I left."

"Busy?" Arthur played dumb.

"With Francis!" Alfred said, looking upset. "You could've told me you had a boyfriend!"

"And if I had, would you have still ended up here? Crying?"

He didn't respond for a moment. "N-No, of course not! I mean, it would've been better if you told us!"

Arthur couldn't help but feel amused. Alfred honestly thought these things? "Alfred, I don't have a boyfriend. However, I am looking into finding one. I'm sorry to tell you this so late, but I rather enjoy men."

Alfred blinked at him, not understanding his good mood and wary because of it. "I…already figured that out because of you kissing Francis…" He said slowly.

"Honestly, Alfred, I couldn't give a damn about Francis. That fucker stole a kiss from me." He frowned and leaned forward some. "A kiss I was waiting for someone else to steal."

"Yeah? Like who?" Alfred seemed completely thrown for a loop. Arthur mentally sighed at the boy's thick-headedness. It was so obvious. He let his head fall on Alfred's shoulder, trying to build up his courage and keep his mind set straight from wanting to just scold the hell out of Alfred from being a dumbarse. But he knew that would just lead to a fight. The mood was nice. This was his chance.

He lifted his head and scooted a bit forward more to press his forehead to Alfred's, causing the younger male to blush. "I was in that classroom for almost three hours or so waiting for you to come in and kiss me, you idiot. But instead you took too long and because of your blindfold, Francis came in and took advantage of me, kissing me. I kicked his arse and he left but you never came to find me. Do you understand exactly how upset I was?" Alfred opened his mouth to speak but Arthur answered for him, gazing into Alfred's wide blue eyes. "I was very upset. And now I find out that you're in this bedroom sulking because you honestly thought I was dating that arse Francis when really for over a year now all I've wanted was to kiss you? You selfish bastard." With that he leaned forward and captured Alfred's lips a little messily. They were softer, but a little chapped, than he had expected. He closed his eyes and after a moment of shock, Alfred finally began kissing back.

Arthur sighed against the kiss, opening his mouth up for a moment that allowed Alfred to take advantage, wrapping his arms around Arthur's waist as he plunged into Arthur's mouth. The older boy was surprised at just how great he was at kissing but recalled that Alfred had a hell of a lot more time and experience when it came to the virgin Arthur. He felt slightly ashamed of that fact, but it didn't seem that Alfred minded at all as he led Arthur in the dance between them sensually.

Arthur moaned softly, breathing through his nose the best he could. He could smell Alfred's slight cologne –at least Alfred still bathed, thank God- and whimpered ever-so-softly at the smell. He loved that scent. He couldn't help but be turned on as Alfred's hands ran over his form. He wanted to do everything with Alfred, all of a sudden. Right there, in that bed. He wanted to have sex. He wanted Alfred badly and crawled into his lap, pulling him close to show what he wanted.

Alfred pulled back, gasping for air. "Holy shit, Artie. You're already so hard!" He looked between them down at the large bulge in Arthur's trousers. Arthur flushed.

"I-I can't help my body, dammit!" He pulled Alfred into a clumsy kiss that the other boy quickly corrected before pulling back again.

"I…I won't have sex with you." Alfred hesitated a little as he spoke, surprising Arthur. "We're…finally dating right? I don't want to start off with sex immediately."

Arthur felt disappointment flow through his system. "I-I understand." He released Alfred and moved to climb off of him. "Just…may I use your restroom?"

Alfred shook his head. "No…" He blushed a little but smiled. "Just do it here!"

Arthur gaped at him. "You want me to…here? Are you mad!"

Alfred's grin widened. "Of course not! But you hurt me, so this is payback! Come on, it's not like I'll tell!" Arthur shook his head in refusal.

"Bloody hell, no!" He hissed, mortified.

"Then we won't be together. You can go home now."

Arthur stared at him. "You…you manipulative little-!" Alfred grinned at him.

"If you do it here, I'll give you a little stimulation?" He suggested.

Arthur was horrified but his cock throbbed painfully. Alfred helping with stimulation? "F…fine…" He whispered and Alfred sat up more in attentiveness.

"Really?" He asked.

"Yes, just…shut it!" Arthur looked down and unbuckled his belt and opened his pants, pulling himself out. Alfred watched him and nodded in appreciation. Arthur was sure he was bright red. "Bastard…" He murmured.

"Just do to yourself what you would've done in the bathroom!" Alfred said, getting comfortable with Arthur on his lap.

Arthur hadn't thought that a simple apology would lead to this so he closed his eyes and tried not to think that he was being watched as his hand began to stroke his cock. His breathing picked up and he shifted in Alfred's lap, speeding up his hand. He gasped, imagining Alfred's hands on his body as his free hand ran under his shirt and vest to touch himself, tweaking a nipple. "A-Alfred…!" He whispered, withering lost in his fantasy where Alfred was the one touching him all over and kissing him and-

Suddenly a pair of lips found his own and his eyes snapped open to find Alfred devouring his lips, his hands shooting under Arthur's shirt to knock Arthur's hands away and take its place. "More." Alfred growled out, his hardness pressing against Arthur's ass. "Keep going. Keep touching yourself." So Arthur did –somewhat reluctantly because I wished that Alfred was the one stroking him. He moved his hand in quick jerking motions as Alfred touched his chest everywhere or moved his hands to hang onto Arthur's hips to grind against him. Alfred leaned into Arthur's ear and panted and whispered, "Keep going, Artie. Does it feel good? Do you like it?"

"Oh god, yes Alfred…!" Arthur whimpered into the air, trying to keep it down for Matthew's sake.

"Are you close?" He whispered again, sucking on Arthur's earlobe.

"Y-yes! A bit more!" His legs were cramping from tightening them, but he didn't care. His release was close. His thumb came up to rub at his own slit, his hand wet with precum, before the rest of the hand followed right as he came. "ALFR-!" Alfred's lips cut him off as Arthur bucked into his own hand until he emptied himself shivering at the intensity of his orgasm.

Alfred pulled back, panting heavily with his own muscles trembling. He had reached his climax without Arthur noticing and Arthur pulled his dripping hand away from himself, about to ask for a tissue when Alfred grabbed the hand and began cleaning it with his tongue. Arthur twitched at the sight and Alfred finished cleaning him. "Huh. Tastes a little different from Matt's…weird."

Arthur kissed him in post-orgasmic bliss. Fuck, if the orgasm was that great when Alfred wasn't even the one touching him there, he couldn't wait to actually have sex. "Alfred…" He whispered taking this chance of high courage to grab his cheeks. "I love you. And I'd love to date you if you'd have me."

Alfred stared at him for a moment before he gently kissed his lips. "Dude, I'd love to!"

* * *

**A/N: Eyyup. So! What do you guys thinks? Hadn't honestly expected to have anything perverted in it but I got away from myself. ^^;**

**Onwards to Pirate Ages! HUZZAH!  
**

**Also, about the suggestion to have a PruCan chapter, I'll throw one in okay? Probably at the end of the story but maybe with, like, Gilbert's whole take on the brother complex or something. Or maybe a time skip towards the future...dunno yet. I'll make you guys a chapter. :D**

**(Btw, you should totally review)**


	10. Opinion Vote

**A/N: Hiya, guys! Sorry if you thought this was a new chapter. Haha, it's not yet. I'm working on it, but I wanted to do an opinion vote.  
**

**See, for the next "arc" of the story, I have two ways of going at it. One is that I can continue it from Arthur's point of view. Obviously since it's kind of his story it would make sense to go that way, but another idea occurred to me. Part of me also now wants to write from Alfred's point of view. The next arc would seem a lot more personal because it will focus mostly around Matthew and Gilbert's new relationship. **

**Before you consider, allow me to point out my thoughts about writing from Alfred's point of view. One is that it'll add a healthy dose of Americest into the story –which is a minor pairing in it but doesn't really have any action- that won't be too explicit. Another thing is I always like getting two points of views in my stories (Tsuki no Waltz's random Alfred chapter is a prime example) and I would be nice to have Alfred's thoughts.**

**However, Arthur has been the main character this whole time so I won't mind at all continuing it from his point of view. After all, why would I? It's his story. But it would seem less…personal and I feel a part of the story that can only shown from Alfred's point of view will be missing.**

***thinks* Okay, let me sum that up. If I write from Alfred's, you'll get more of Matthew's take on the story between him and Gilbert. If I write Arthur's, it will be Gilbert's take on the relationship. So please let me know what you think. Like I said, I'm fine with writing from either side so please give me your honest opinion!**

Thank you!


	11. Chapter 10

**A/N: Okay, it seems a majority of you guys want to see Alfred's point of view. You won't have to worry because the story is **_**still**_** USUK and will be about Arthur and Alfred…it's just that now we're seeing Gilbert's reaction to…everything. So I'll write from Alfred's now. I hope you guys enjoy either way, even if it's a change of pace.**

**For now it'll just be about Alfred and Arthur but in the next chapter starts fun stuff. And should I write a sex scene in here~?**

* * *

Alfred woke up curled against his brother with Matthew tucked happily into his arms. Alfred yawned widely and stretched, listening to the blare of their alarm clock going off. It was time for school –a place Alfred had been skipping for three days now. He couldn't miss another day. But this time he didn't want to. A grin spread across his face sleepily as he recalled what happened yesterday.

He and Arthur were finally together. And Arthur had given him quite the show on top of it too! That look on his face as he touched himself…the gasping and panting and the whispering of Alfred's name from those lips…Alfred couldn't resist capturing them. He could still hear the slick sound of that hand slipping up and down Arthur's cock and a shiver of want ran through him as he kissed the person in his arms, wrapping his arms and legs around him.

Matthew grunted in surprise at the awakening and turned his head away with a soft groan. "Al, you're hard and it's only six? What the hell…"

Alfred opened his eyes and slowly came to his senses, still wrapped around his brother. "Oh…shoot, sorry Matt. I guess I still wasn't fully awake yet." He smiled sheepishly.

Matthew shook his head and extracted himself from his brother to sit up and turn off the alarm. "I know you're excited about Arthur, but did you really have to get hard so early? Go to the bathroom." He rolled out of the bed and padded in just his boxers over to closet door to pull out his uniform.

"You don't wanna help?" Alfred teased his brother, wiggling his eyebrows as he too got out of bed. He looked down at himself. Yup, he was completely hard. Great. _I love waking up with morning wood._ He thought sarcastically.

His brother shot him a look. "Al…You know our deal."

Alfred nodded. "Yeah, I know. I was just joking." Alfred stood up and left the room, only in boxers as well. He and Matthew had both agreed the night before after Arthur had left –completely against what Alfred had wanted but Arthur had to leave anyway- that now that they were dating other people there would be no cheating. No sex, nothing sexual, and only an occasional kiss –they couldn't deny themselves that much. It wasn't possible- would be allowed. Alfred wouldn't be the one to break it.

* * *

One of the best things about dating Arthur was that Alfred didn't need to explain anything to him. He already knew practically everything thanks to that blog –that ridiculous blog that neither of the brothers had expected to become so popular nor had expected their best friends to discover- and had accepted both of the brothers without complaint. Alfred was completely grateful for that. He wouldn't know what to do if Arthur had told Alfred not to love his brother or told him that it was disgusting and wrong. It would break his heart. He would've been furious at him too. Nobody could tell him what was right and wrong. Only Alfred knew what was right and wrong in his book.

"You have a lot of homework to catch up on while you were sulking, Alfred." Arthur informed him as the two stood together hidden behind the bleachers during P.E.

Alfred jutted his bottom lip out childishly. "I wasn't sulking. I had a good reason."

Arthur rolled his eyes, appearing a little amused. "You made a mistake. You should've stayed a second longer."

"Whatever, man. I didn't bring you under here to lecture me."

Arthur raised one of his gigantic, hairy, perfect eyebrows. "What _did_ you bring me back here for? We're missing out on the sports."

"It's a free day!" Alfred objected, smiling. "And it's obvious what I pulled you under here for!" He placed his hands on Arthur's hips and stepped closer.

"What do you- oh." Arthur blushed a little. "No. No, no, no, Alfred! I refuse!"

Alfred gaped a little. "Why?" He whined.

"Because we're in the middle of _class_, Alfred!" He hissed under his breath, not wanting to attract attention even though the gymnasium was loud anyway.

"So?" He puckered his lips a little in a pout, scrunching his eyebrows together. "Nobody'll see us! And I want a kiss! We're dating, aren't we?" A sudden insecure spike drove through Alfred's heart. Were they dating? Was this dating? Yes, they had kissed and made out and Arthur had touched himself right in Alfred's lap (oh fuck, Alfred loved that memory), but was that _dating_? Wasn't that just fooling around? He didn't know. He'd never actually dated someone before. He and Mattie were just…together. Was he actually dating Arthur?

Arthur appeared to notice the panic-stricken look on his face and he cupped Alfred's cheek, looking worried. "What is it, love? What's the matter?"

Alfred took a breath. "This…We _are_ dating, right? This is…dating?"

Arthur stared at him uncomprehending for a moment. Alfred watched him too silently and saw as it clicked together in the senior's head. Arthur's eyes softened and he stroked Alfred's cheeks with his thumbs. "Yes, we are darling." He paused.

This time it was Alfred's turn, now that his worry had been appeased. "What? Why'd you stop?"

"It's just…" Arthur sighed, "Alfred, there's only one thing I wish to ask of you." Alfred was suddenly worried again. He knew that tone. Arthur was going to do something painful to him. It was the same tone his parents used as well. No, no, no! He didn't want to hear it! He wanted to run before Arthur could separate him and his brother! "I would just like you to stop comparing your brother and me to each other."

Alfred froze in the midst of his terror. "W-what?" That wasn't what he had been expecting. "You…don't want Mattie and me to stop, y'know, us?"

Arthur frowned. "I would never ask you to do that. I understand what that relationship means to you two. While I would prefer you two not to have sex while you and I are dating…I'm not going to stop you. Do what you like."

Alfred laughed breathily in relief. Kiku and Nicole had been right for sure about him; He was extremely paranoid. But he supposed he had to be in the type of world he lived in. "Don't worry about that, Artie! Matt and I already agreed that we wouldn't do anything besides kissing every now and again while we're dating other people! No cheating!"

"And I suppose that day you ran home to Matthew and you two had sex doesn't count?" Arthur asked lightly. Alfred sputtered in shock. How did Arthur find out about that? "Obviously you didn't read the latest entry of your blog, Alfred." Arthur answered him.

"Matt put that on there?" Alfred whined. "I told him not to!"

"He did anyhow. How did you think I found out about your sulking?" Arthur hesitated for a moment and stepped closer to his boyfriend so they were chest-to-chest and touched Alfred's hair gently. Alfred blinked at the movement but felt like leaning into the touch on his hair. Matt had always considered him like a puppy with the way he loved his hair being touched. "Alfred…is it true that…" Arthur face was slightly pink, "is it true that when you were having sex with Matthew…you were imagining me?"

Alfred face lit up with a blush. "H-How did you-?" Arthur's face turned redder. "I-I-Uh…oh shit." Alfred covered his face. So his brother Matthew had written that in the blog as well. He should've checked to see if Matt had updated it. It wasn't like he had been trying to hide the fact that he had been imaging Arthur. There was no doubt in his mind he had been saying Arthur's name at that time. He would have to apologize to Matthew. He had used him for his own comfort and sexual fantasy.

Arthur cleared his throat. "W-Well, I suppose we should head back." He turned to leave. Alfred grabbed his arm and tugged him back, though so his chest was to Arthur's back and wrapped his arms around his waist. "A-Alfred!" Arthur gasped, surprised.

"Leaving already?" Alfred asked. "But you haven't given me my kiss yet!"

Arthur struggled in his arms but Alfred refused to release him until their lips were pressed together. Arthur seemed to accept his fate and he sighed, finally stopping. He looked over his shoulder at his persistent boyfriend. "If I kiss you, then we must return to our classes."

"Alright, cool." Alfred agreed and Arthur tilted his head up to meet his lips. Alfred's body tingled with happiness. It was so strange kissing someone other than his brother. The feel of the lips were different. The shape was different. And the scent that invaded his nose was different. _Tea. That's what Arthur smells like. Tea and a hint of roses._ Alfred decided as he licked Arthur bottom lip in an attempt to get him to allow access. Arthur opened his mouth and turned around in Alfred's arms to wrap his own arms around his boyfriend's neck. _Matt smells like maple syrup._ Alfred moaned softly as their tongues moved against each other. _They taste like they smell. Weird._

Arthur pulled back first, panting softly with his face a little flushed. Alfred could tell he wasn't used to kissing. His reactions were adorable. Alfred just wanted to keep going. He wanted to see Arthur's face flushed with pleasure as it had been last night. He was seeing a lot of new emotions he'd never seen on Arthur's face before. For a moment Alfred considered what it would be like if he had sex with Arthur right there under the bleachers –_Kinky._- but decided he could never do it.

"That's enough now." Arthur murmured but even so pecked Alfred's lips before pulling away. "Go back to your class before we both get in trouble. I need to keep up my image as the student council president and can't be seeing performing PDA during class."

Alfred rolled his eyes. Arthur and his student council position were annoying. He needed to loosen up. "Okay. See ya later, Artie!" Alfred waved and walked off.

* * *

"So things are fine between you and Arthur now?" Matthew asked as he and his brother sat on the wall surrounding the school and waiting for their friends to join them. Alfred and Arthur were going over to Arthur's house today so Matthew was waiting for him with Alfred.

"Yup! It seems everything's okay!" Alfred said cheerfully. His brother gave him a bit of a sad smile. Alfred looked at him in confusion. "What's up?"

"Al, I forgot to tell you something…" Matthew started. Alfred waited. "Gilbert and I, we…um…we started dating."

Alfred felt a spear of jealousy pierce him. "When?" He asked, his hands beginning to tremble a bit. He clenched them into fists, confused by his reaction. Matthew took his hands and held them in his.

"Calm down, Al." He said desperately. Alfred's trembling only became worse. He was scared. He had expected this to happen, but he didn't think he would react this way. He was terrified. Would his brother be taken from him now? Would he lose him? He couldn't lose Matt. Not again. "Please, calm down!" Alfred looked at his brother and saw that he had tears in his eyes. "Take deep breaths! You're panicking!" Alfred realized his brother was right. He was having a panic attack. He needed to calm down.

He gulped a few breaths slowly as the brothers pressed their foreheads together. They did this for about a minute before Alfred's trembling began to subside. He opened his eyes. "Okay…I'm better." He promised.

"Okay." Matt smiled softly at him. "It wasn't too long ago. We've only kissed once. It was the day that Arthur and Francis kissed. I was going to tell you Al, but I couldn't. Not when…" He trailed off. Alfred understood anyhow. It was part of the reason why he loved his brother. Matt was always looking out for him. From a stupid dropped ice cream cone to saving him from emotional despair.

"I…I'm happy for you, bro." Alfred got out even though a part of him felt like he was lying. But he wasn't. He was honestly glad that Matthew was in love with someone else. But still it hurt him. The part of him that only wanted Matthew to himself was jealous. He wondered if Matt felt the same about him and Arthur.

"Are you?" Matthew smiled looking relieved but Alfred knew his brother could see right through him. He always could.

Alfred stroked Matthew's cheek once before they released each other. "Yeah, I am. Mostly." He admitted with a smile.

"If you're sure."

"Hey guys!" Nicole called as she ran up to them. Kiku followed soon after her along with Gilbert. Nicole hopped up onto the wall. "So did you and Arthur work things out?" She asked immediately.

"Yeah, we did!" Alfred laughed.

"Speaking of Lord Eyebrows, where is he?" Gilbert asked, looking around.

"My name is 'Arthur', goddammit." Arthur stated as he walked up, frowning at Gilbert. He hit him with a notebook. "And if you keep it up, I won't let you borrow my notes."

"Fine." Gilbert said and took the notebook, moving to put it into his backpack. "So now everyone in the group is dating, huh?"

"Looks like it." Kiku said.

"That's so cool! We should have a group date soon! To, like, a fair or something!"

"That sounds awesome!" Alfred agreed happily, over his fit by this point. He had never actually been to a town fair before. His parents would never take him or his brother because they thought they were better than that. And after they had run away he and Matt had been trying to save the little bit of money they had left over the years.

"I suppose I wouldn't mind." Arthur said.

"Then we should. Is this weekend good?" Matthew asked. "We're free." The others all nodded in agreements. Arthur looked over at Alfred and Matthew. Alfred met his look and he shrugged a little, not understanding what he was silently asking.

"Anyway, come on Birdie!" Gilbert grabbed Matthew's hand and gently tugged him off of the wall. Alfred sucked in air quickly and silently between his teeth, a possessive thought running through his head before he bashed it away, scolding himself. He needed to keep his head straight. This was the way things were now. "We should hurry before we miss your bus!"

"Yeah." Matthew nodded and looked back at Alfred. "I'll see you at home, Al." He smiled. Alfred returned the smile. They both silently agreed that they would text each other throughout the date. Alfred moved to turn his phone's ringtone on as his brother left.

"We should leave as well." Kiku said. "We'll miss our bus, Nicole."

"Yeah! See you guys tomorrow!" She called and hopped off of the wall before following Kiku, her laughs reaching them. That left Alfred and Arthur. Arthur looked at Alfred as the other boy hopped off of the wall.

"Alfred, will you be able to pay for your tickets on Saturday? I understand that you're not exactly full of money…" Arthur asked as they two walked towards his car. Alfred looked at him and shoved his hands into his jersey's pockets.

"Maybe. Matt and I will just have to pick up a couple shifts, is all." He said.

"Are you sure you don't want me to pay?" He asked, looking concerned. Alfred shook his head.

"We don't get to splurge much." He grinned at him teasingly. "Don't flaunt your money, dude."

Arthur sputtered. "I-I'm _not_ flaunting my money! I was only suggesting that I help out, you ungrateful git!"

"No need for names, dude!" Arthur unlocked his car and the two climbed in. Alfred couldn't help but feel so poor next to Arthur. He remembered the days (reluctantly) when he was rich. Well, he could put up with not having much money. But part of him wished he still had money to splurge.

"Whatever." They drove to Arthur's house mostly in silence. Alfred was enjoying the music of the car and he figured he could talk to Arthur at his house. When they had arrived and entered Arthur's room, Arthur asked a surprising question, "Alfred, I'm curious. You two never explained it in your blog very well, but how do you two feel about the other dating other people?" He climbed onto his bed. Alfred hopped up with him and the two lay back onto the covers.

"Well…I don't really know." Alfred frowned and looked at Arthur. The other boy gazed back at him. "I guess the same way anyone would feel?"

Arthur furrowed his brows. "How so?"

"It's, um…" Alfred tried to think of a way to explain it, "It's like when someone you used to be together with and cared greatly for moved on to another person because your feelings weren't the same anymore."

"That's so sad." Alfred didn't need to look at Arthur to see his pitying look. He turned his head to gaze at the top of the canopy. Damn, Arthur's bed was comfortable.

"Yeah, I guess. But we haven't lost each other and besides," he rolled over and pulled Arthur to him to hug him, snuggling his face into Arthur's chest with a grin, "we have our new lovers anyway, right?"

"Y-yes, I suppose that's true." Arthur agreed, stroking Alfred's hair. Alfred closed his eyes in contentment and enjoyed the feeling of the petting. The two spent the next hour chatting and cuddling with each other and arguing lightly. Alfred was happy. Admittedly before all of this he was wary of being together with another person. He was scared of losing a friend. He was scared of what would happen between him and his brother. But here he was happily in Arthur's arms, kissing him and being loved by him, and there Matthew was having fun with Gilbert (Alfred texted him the whole time because they needed to keep in contact with each other). Everything was wonderful.

Alfred was just beginning to drift off while he was lying with his head in Arthur's lap and watching anime on Arthur's laptop when his phone buzzed again. Alfred ignored it for a moment as he tilted his head for Arthur to touch a sweet spot on Alfred's head (Arthur had learnt by this point that Alfred loved having his hair played with, it seemed) before he picked up his phone to gaze at his text from his brother: **Just got home from the date. Al, Gil's reading the blog. I'm scared. Help.**

Alfred sat up swiftly –fast enough to get a head rush- and startled Arthur. He rolled off of the bed and ran for his shoes to pull them on and grab his jacket. "Alfred, what's the matter?" Arthur asked.

"I need to get home now!" Alfred cried, and finally pulled his shoes on, about to run out of the door in his need to get home.

"H-Hang on, I'll drive you!" Arthur rushed to pull on a pair of sandals before the two headed down to the car. Alfred could feel fear running through him for his brother. "I'm scared. Help." Those words kept repeating in his head. He needed to get home. He needed to be with his brother. He couldn't hold still.

The moment Arthur pulled up at Alfred and Matthew's apartment, Alfred jumped out and dashed up to the apartment, throwing open the door. Matthew sat on the couch watching their crappy television. Alfred jumped over the couch and hugged him close. "Matt, are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm just…Al, I'm scared." Matthew looked at his brother in fear. Alfred knew what he was thinking. It was the same feeling Alfred had when he had discovered that Arthur was reading the blog. How would Gilbert react to the blog? Would Matthew be lucky like Alfred and have his boyfriend understand? He didn't know. So he held his brother close.

"No matter what happens, I'm here for you. Always."

* * *

**A/N: Alright! First of Alfred's chapter! What do you guys think? Get a little more insight on the brothers' relationship? Find it more interesting? Tell me!**

**(I've been meaning to say this but because I'm forgetful I forget but I LOVE long reviews. Don't be afraid to give me a long honest opinion. I love reading them. They're my favourites.)**


	12. Chapter 11

**A/N: So I've been slow with updates. I realize this. OTL I'm sorry. I promised that I would try to update every Saturday. However, I can't promise that I'll update both at the same time. So I'll update Brother Complex today but I can't promise Pirate Ages. Though I can try.  
In retrospect, maybe I shouldn't have done that scene between Arthur and Alfred in the bedroom…I feel that my perverted self got ahead of me. I wish I could remove it but I can't so I'll have to deal with it. Sorry if that threw things off.**

* * *

Alfred and Matthew were waiting in the parking lot of the apartment complex they lived in waiting to be picked up. Today was the day of the big date. He was excited. It had been a while since he and his friends all went out together. And now he could actually make comments about Arthur that before would've given away his feelings. And this would be an excellent day to relax. The past two weeks had been stressful. Today they would only have fun.

Matthew turned to Alfred and grabbed his hand gently to attract his attention. "What are you thinking about?" He asked. Alfred smiled kindly at his brother.

"Thinking about how fun this will be." He said. "I'm glad that we get to all be together."

"Me too." He looked down in thought. Alfred knew what he was thinking about without asking. It was completely different than what Alfred was thinking about, though. Matthew had been worrying about Gilbert. He was terrified to death about how Gilbert would take the news about America and Canada. But more than that he was afraid of Gilbert finding out that Matthew had cheated on his boyfriend so early in their relationship. Alfred felt guilty. It was all his fault. If Gilbert hated Matthew, he would hate himself.

A white van pulled up and honked, causing the brothers to jump and release each other's hand. "Get in!" Gilbert called from the driver's seat. Beside him in the passenger's side Kiku was climbing out to move into the back. No doubt so that Matthew could sit up front. Alfred ran up to the van with Matthew following behind and jumped into the vehicle as his brother climbed into the front.

"This yours, Gilbert?" Alfred asked, unable to help his excited grin.

"Nah, it's my mom's. I asked to borrow it since we have so many people." Gilbert replied. Alfred and Matthew both greeted their friends and Alfred spotted Arthur sitting in the back. He joined him and sat down in the seat next to him.

"Hey, Artie!" He said.

"Good morning." Arthur replied with a slight yawn. The boy looked rather tired. Alfred frowned in question. "I stayed up late with student council work." He explained.

"Dude, you need a break from that."

"Isn't that what this is?"

"Does that mean there is more that you need to do?" Kiku interrupted politely.

"Unfortunately." Arthur yawned again.

"Well you can sleep a bit longer on the trip." Nicole said. "It's, like, an hour and half where we're going."

"Seriously?" Alfred groaned. That was so far from now! Gilbert drove the car off and they started on their trip. Alfred tried to keep a steady conversation going but it appeared that Arthur was about to pass out. The movement of the van was lulling him to sleep along with the soft Japanese music Kiku had provided playing. Alfred vaguely recognized _Romeo and Cinderella_ and both he and Matthew –who turned around in his seat- gave him dry looks. Kiku pointed at Nicole who made a playful face.

After about fifteen minutes Alfred had an idea and nudged Arthur awake a bit. "Here, lay on my lap!" He suggested. It was a date, after all. Arthur looked at him in surprise and shook his head.

"No, it's quite alright." He objected, blushing slightly at the suggestion. Arthur's pale skin easily revealed his mood, Alfred had come to realize.

"Come on! It's better than falling asleep like that! Do it! Come on!" He wouldn't stop bugging Arthur until he did. Eventually Arthur did give up.

"O-Only for a little while. Wake me up in a few minutes! I only need to nap." Arthur unbuckled his seat belt and curled up on the seat with his head in Alfred's lap. Alfred grinned at him and Arthur became red to the point his ears were pinking. Alfred bit back his chuckle knowing the older boy would move if he laughed. Arthur closed his eyes stubbornly –trying to retain some pride- and within moments his breathing had evened out and he fell asleep.

"Wow, he was more tired than I thought." Nicole commented.

"Lord Eyebrows? Nah, he always falls asleep quickly." Gilbert objected from up front, glancing in the rearview mirror to look at them. Matthew changed the song.

"Really? Hahaha!" She laughed.

With that much of the trip was filled with talking or singing to various songs on the radio. Eventually they switched to English songs so that they could stop butchering the Japanese language and that took up the majority of the hour. Soon after things began to calm down and Gilbert started a separate conversation with Matthew and Nicole turned suddenly to face Alfred as a thought occurred to her.

"How are things between those two?" She asked quietly, motioning to the couple.

Alfred gently pet Arthur's hair, his fingers brushing his eyebrows and finding them amazingly soft. He kept petting them idly. "Fine, I guess. Matt's worried." He admitted lowly.

"I am sure Gilbert will not want to hurt Matthew." Kiku stated, joining their conversation even as he read his manga book. For a moment he wondered how he could not want to spend this time with Nicole but then he remembered that their relationship wasn't as new as his or Matthew's. As far as he knew, they always spent time together.

"Yeah, you're probably right. But still…I have a bad feeling."

"Probably just the bond between you and Matt?" Nicole suggested. Alfred looked at her, not understanding. "Like, you feel his unease." She clarified.

Alfred shrugged. "I dunno. I guess."

* * *

Arriving at the park Alfred marveled at the tall structures. He had never seen the skyline so filled with roller coasters before. The only theme parks he had been to had the smaller kid rides. He had never been big enough to ride anything bigger. But now he could. And he was determined to ride all of them.

"So how are we going to do this?" Gilbert asked as they went over to get maps of the park.

"Roller coasters!" Both Nicole and Alfred cried together, equally excited. The two turned to each other and grinned with a laugh.

"Not that." Gilbert shook his head. "I mean, are we all going together or splitting up?"

"Why would we split up?" Matthew asked quietly. Alfred could tell his brother was rather awed by all the noise around him as well.

"Because even though we're together, this is still a date!" Gilberts said. "And I'm sure we all want alone time!" Alfred could see the reason in that but he personally didn't mind if they split up or not. He wanted to share this fun with everyone.

Kiku looked at his watch. "It will be noon in about three hours." They had arrived when the park had opened. "How about we all stay together until we eat lunch and then we will go off alone?" He suggested.

"I'm for it!" Alfred said.

"Yes, that sounds fine." Arthur agreed, looking down at the map already deciding on what path they should walk. They all agreed to the idea and they went off. Alfred was ecstatic throughout the trip. Actually hanging out with his friends was a thrill. Admittedly he wasn't exactly happy that everything was so expensive because he couldn't buy much and he constantly had to hear Arthur offering to pay for anything. But still all of the rides were thrilling. Adrenaline surged through his veins and he felt like running everywhere.

At one of the rides much later on Nicole paused and groaned. "Oh man, if only it wasn't so cold! The water rides aren't open!" The autumn chill in the air had them all wearing coats and sweaters. Nicole appeared disappointed.

"Would you have ridden them even if they were open?" Arthur questioned her as Gilbert and Matthew posed for a comical picture in front of a dinosaur figure. Kiku took the picture, practically glowing. Alfred discovered that the boy loved coming to these types of places. He took pictures every chance he received.

"Of course!" Nicole said. "I don't care if it's cold!" Alfred made a face at the thought. He loved water rides too, but he hated the cold. He knew that he would've been freezing. He didn't know how to feel about what Nicole had said. They joined the other three who were chuckling at the picture. "You know," Nicole suddenly said and Alfred prepared himself for one of her random thoughts. They were always amusing, though, "I have a reverse harem going on here! It's just really funny because all of you are gay!" She laughed and ran off a little ahead and motioned for them to follow. The other boys were a mixture of amused, exasperated, and slightly embarrassed that she had said it so loudly.

Arthur covered his face and sighed as Kiku sighed. Alfred laughed at her. His friends were so weird, he decided cheerfully. He couldn't have been happier.

* * *

After they ate lunch together they all agreed it was time to separate. As much fun as it had been, Alfred couldn't help but agree a bit that it would be nice to have Arthur to himself for a little while. He took his hand and Kiku and Nicole waved as they went off together. Arthur and Alfred left next in a different direction, Alfred slowly releasing Arthur's hand casually so as to appear as if he had only been leading him in a certain direction and had not been holding his hand. He didn't need people to be suspicious. Arthur looked at him in slight surprise but didn't say anything as Alfred smiled at him. He looked away.

For a short while they walked in silence before Alfred struck up a conversation. "Man that was good! Why is everything so expensive, though?" He whined a bit.

"I could always-" Alfred cut him off.

"No. Artie, I told you I don't want your money."

"But you said you had to tap into reserves just to come here!" Arthur protested.

"Yeah, but that's not a big deal! Matt and I can easily make end's meat!" Alfred wrapped an arm around his shoulder. "Don't worry about us so much. We've survived this long, after all."

"If you say so." Arthur consented and looked down a bit in embarrassment. Alfred dropped his arm and pointed out a ride they hadn't gone on yet and ran over to it. Arthur followed after him.

Their day was filled with riding the exciting rides. Alfred groaned at some of the rides Arthur chose –they were so slow and tended to be slightly educational on occasion- but in return Arthur seemed displeased with Alfred's obsession with even riding a couple of the children's rides. "It's because I didn't get to ride these when I was little!" Alfred explained and then Arthur quieted.

Alfred began to realize that Arthur was sensitive towards him. He was constantly tip-toeing around the subject of Alfred's past. It bothered the younger boy some. He didn't need to be sensitive. Arthur wasn't going to upset him at all –unless he began to probe too far- so he didn't need to be quiet. He kind of wanted Arthur to ask about his past. Some things needed to be let out, but Alfred didn't want to be the one to bring them up. It was too difficult for him.

A little while later Alfred felt fear building up within him. He recognized what it was immediately and he paused in his walking to pull out his cell phone quickly. However, finding the battery dead his heart rate picked up. His breathing became faster and he looked around. Were there phones in this park? No, they didn't have phones, did they? Alfred's breathing became gasps. His body began to tremble. He was alone. He was completely alone with no way of contacting anyone.

"Alfred. Alfred!" Alfred's shoulders were grabbed and his blurring vision focused on the person in front of him. Arthur's green eyes were bright with worry. Hands grabbed Alfred's face and Alfred instinctively pressed his forehead gently to the person's in front of him. Arthur started to back up but then hesitated and stayed where he was. Alfred's breathing calmed a little. "Alfred, love, what's wrong?" Arthur demanded, his face a little pink at the contact but otherwise scared for his boyfriend.

"Matt. Where's Mattie? I can't contact him. Where is he?" He whispered, clenching Arthur's shoulders tightly. Arthur winced but didn't move away.

"Is your cell dead? Here, you can use mine. Calm down. It's alright." Arthur pulled out his cell phone and Alfred immediately snatched it and dialed Matthew's phone number. He rushed over to a bench and sat upon it as the phone rang and Arthur joined him, still worried. After two rings the phone was picked up.

"Al?" Alfred's body immediately relaxed at the sound of his brother's voice. He could tell the other boy had been on the brink of hysteria too. "Al. Thank god. Why didn't you pick up your phone?"

"Sorry. My battery died. I forgot to charge it last night."

"That's why you weren't responding to my texts." Matt sighed. "Well who's phone are you using?"

"Artie's." Alfred smiled at Arthur and the other boy looked slightly confused but relieved. "I can text you from here, okay?"

"That's fine. I'm just glad…" He trailed off but Alfred didn't need him to finish. He already knew. "I'll talk to you later."

"Yeah." Alfred hung up but didn't give Arthur back his phone. He looked at his boyfriend sheepishly. "Sorry."

"Are you alright?" Arthur asked after a small hesitation.

"Yeah. It's just…you know…complex issues…" Alfred could practically see Arthur's mind going back to the blog that he read.

"Oh. Oh yes, that's right. You worried me." He sighed and then stood. Alfred followed him as they walked, looking at a map together to decide where they wanted to go. Alfred looked up suddenly and spotted a familiar shape and saw his brother and Gilbert. Gilbert's silver-blonde hair stuck out quite a bit in the crowd. Alfred stared at them and Arthur paused as well. "Is that Matthew and Gilbert?" He questioned.

"Yeah." Alfred saw that their hands were connected and they didn't mind walking and exposing their relationship. Alfred felt jealousy boil in his gut. Why couldn't he do that? Why was it that he couldn't grab Arthur's hand and walk easily with him like his brother and Gilbert did? He was scared. He was afraid that somebody would yell at them. He was so terrified of the fact. _In the end,_ Alfred thought, _Matt's still stronger than I am._ He sighed at the fact.

He caught Arthur staring at him and he met his gaze. "What's up?" Arthur turned his head away and walked off silently. His pace was a little faster than usual. His back was slightly hunched and his head was down some. Alfred could read body language well. He had to if he was to survive his father's drunk rampages. He ran up and grabbed Arthur's shoulder, worried. "What's wrong?" He asked.

Arthur shrugged him off. "It's nothing." He said quietly and kept walking. Alfred couldn't see his eyes.

"Artie." Alfred tried again. "Tell me. What happened? What's wrong?" Alfred felt Arthur's phone vibrate with a message from his brother in his pocket but he ignored it.

Arthur glanced at him and Alfred saw sheen over them. They were misted over. Alfred paled. "I don't understand, Alfred." He whispered and moved over out of the flow of the crowd, standing in a secluded area of the bathrooms.

"What?" Alfred asked, following him.

"Alfred…if you really want your brother more than me then please just tell me." Arthur looked away as he said this softly. Alfred froze. "I-it's not fair to me if even while we're together we're not…'together'."

"Wait, what do you mean?" Alfred was sure he had been acting like a proper boyfriend. What had gone wrong? Where had he gone wrong? "Artie, of course I want to be with you! I don't…love my brother in that way anymore!"

"Then why do you become jealous at the sight of Gilbert and Matthew together?" Arthur demanded, glaring at Alfred. Alfred could see him refusing to cry. He wasn't sure whether he loved or hated Arthur's expansive pride.

"I-" Alfred looked away this time as he thought of how to phrase it. He then looked back at Arthur and pinned him between his arms as he leaned forward a bit. "I'm still…possessive of Mattie. It bothers me a bit to see him with someone else, but I don't want him in that way." He assured him.

"…You appeared jealous earlier."

Alfred grinned shamefacedly. "I was, but not for the reason you're thinking of. It was because…Matt can…hold hands in public." He looked down, blushing in shame.

Arthur hadn't been expecting that answer. He stared at him. "Is that so?" He asked.

"Y-yeah."

"Why is that?" He asked, probing gently. Alfred felt slight relief. Finally Arthur was asking about his past again.

"Because…Matt and I had to hide our relationship and when we were younger our…parents would get mad if we held hands…"

"I see." Arthur nodded in understanding. "That's why you didn't…earlier…" He shook his head and smiled gently at Alfred. "I understand now. Alfred," Arthur pushed the slightly taller boy away softly and then linked their fingers together with a small blush. Alfred felt his face heat up a little at the touch as their fingers interlocked and Arthur pressed his lips to his. Alfred kissed him back before the older boy pulled away, "it's alright to hold my hand sometimes." Arthur admitted, embarrassed. "So…don't be afraid…"

Alfred nodded once and the two walked out and back into the crowd with their hands still linked. Alfred felt a smile constantly keep a presence on his lips. _Matt,_ he thought to himself proudly, _I think I became just a bit more mature._

* * *

Matthew paused and he turned around to look behind him. Gilbert was pulled to a stop beside him. "What's up?" He asked. Their hands were still together. Matthew thought he spotted his brother in the crowd but the person had soon disappeared.

"It's nothing." He assured him with a soft smile. Gilbert smiled back and the two kept up their walk. Matthew was still waiting for his brother to respond to his text. It had been almost five minutes now. He couldn't be typing a long response, could he?

Matthew remembered how Gilbert reacted to Matthew's minor breakdown. He had been scared and utterly baffled. He had no idea why Matthew had started to shake and breathe hard. Matthew couldn't explain it to him either. He couldn't say that he needed to talk to his brother. Gilbert wouldn't understand. He had to lie to him. He hated it. Matthew always hated lying to people he cared for. He had instead told him he had to check up on his brother. Luckily Alfred called him. Matthew could tell Alfred had been breaking down too. They were generally in sync for such a thing, as ridiculous as it was. At least they both knew when they needed each other's comfort.

Matthew's phone buzzed and he smiled and temporarily ignored it as Gilbert spoke to him. "So that blog I'm reading," he started and Matthew focused in on him, his body stiffening slightly in fear, "it's really weird."

"How so?" Matthew questioned with a small tilt of his head.

"It's just strange. I mean, it's a love story about two brothers…" He trailed off. Matthew was afraid to probe. He didn't push Gilbert to explain more and the topic changed. Matthew lost his chance. Suddenly a spike of jealousy ran through him. Alfred would've been able to get Gilbert to keep talking. He would've been able to get Gilbert's opinion on the blog. But Matthew couldn't. He was too scared. He blamed his momma's upbringing. He was never allowed to talk back to his momma. _In the end,_ Matthew thought to himself, _Al's still stronger than I am._ He sighed quietly to himself. He wished he had the courage to better himself.

* * *

"What's wrong?" Kiku asked as he and Nicole sat at a small picnic table eating some funnel cake. They had just come off of a ride that'd had a long line and their feet were tired. They were taking a rest.

Nicole drank some of her soda and then looked at her boyfriend. "How do you think the others are doing?" She asked.

"What do you mean?" Kiku questioned, taking off a piece of the funnel cake and popping it into his mouth. He wiped lose powdered sugar off of his fingers and lips.

"Well…I'm worried about how Gilbert's going to react. How far do you think he's in the blog?"

"Not far enough." Kiku responded. "If he had discovered Matthew and Alfred's secret then he would let us know. He is not the type to hide his feelings very well."

Nicole smiled and nodded. "That's true. I guess Matthew was right when he said that his brother and Gilbert are alike, huh?"

"Yes, but not completely. I cannot predict how Gilbert will react." A small frown creased his lips. "He has the tendency to be both mature and immature. How he responds to such a discovery could mean all of the difference."

"I'm more worried about him finding out that Matthew cheated on him. I mean, it was for a good reason –I guess- but Gilbert's always been the loyal type…" She trailed off and looked out at the flow of people. The faces were vague and she didn't pay any particular attention to any of them.

"I understand." Kiku said quietly. To himself he wished the two the best.

* * *

**A/N: Okay, I lied a bit. I'm posting it on a Sunday. XD Hahaha, sorry.**


	13. Chapter 12

"You know, you have such brown eyes. But they're light brown. That's really neat, actually." Nicole said as she leaned on her elbows close to Kiku's face. The Japanese boy was trying to ignore her with little success as he was trying to study. Nicole was bored though and was adamantly trying to get him to pay attention to her. She wanted to talk.

Alfred sighed, stuck in a group with people he didn't talk to all that much. Not that they weren't nice but they didn't really have anything in common. Alfred would've happily chatted with Nicole. He cursed his luck that he only had two friends in his block and they were together but he was still stuck by himself. Their group had already finished their work for the day.

His head lulled onto his hand and he gazed absently off into the distance. His mind drifted back to the more recent make-out session with Arthur and a small smile twitched onto his face. The British boy was becoming more confident in his kissing and that confidence caused him to actively participate more in their sessions. It made Alfred giddy at the thought. Arthur had the potential to be a really good kisser. The thought of Arthur kissing him just stirred him up, though. Wild images of his boyfriend in various states of undress popped through his mind until he landed on one where Arthur was completely naked and lying before him on Arthur's big bed.

"_Alfred…" Arthur panted his face bright red and his eyes glittering with need. His body was flushed with arousal from activities he and Alfred had no doubt had taken part in. He was completely naked. _Alfred swallowed thickly. _Arthur spread his legs wide to expose Alfred's prize. "Alfred, why are you waiting? Don't tease me, you stupid git…" The senior breathed. "I can't take anymore teasing…" He touched himself lightly and squeezed his eyes shut._

Alfred groaned to himself, his head hitting the desk in front of him and startling his group. But that was okay. He needed to make sure that nobody could see his semi-hard problem under the desk. He was horny as hell. Even though he and Matthew didn't have sex before they started dating others they at least touched each other. Alfred wasn't used to jerking off anymore. And he didn't want to start up again. It didn't feel nearly as good as someone else's hand.

He absently rubbed the front of his pants before he snuck out his phone. He went down his message lists and thought about texting Arthur but realized that the Brit wouldn't text in class. He was too 'responsible' for that, stingy bastard. **Matt, distract me.**He typed him and sent the message. He waited a few minutes before sending another message, partially whining. His mind kept drifting back to that image and he needed to fend it off. He was in class, dammit. **Mattieeeee!** He sent him. And again, **Matt! **And then Alfred became a little worried. **You okay, bro?**

This time he got a message back. **Al, stop it. My phone keeps vibrating in my pants. I'm trying to concentrate!**

Alfred developed a grin. **Oh? Naughty naughty, Mattie.**

**That's not what I meant!**

**Course not!**

**Shut up, Al. What do you want?**

Alfred hesitated in responding as his teacher passed nearby before he sent his next text, **I'm super horny. Distract me.**

…**Don't tell me you started fantasizing in class?**

**I can't help it! You know how I am!**

**I do. …So was it Arthur or me…?**

Alfred paused and looked at that message before blushing slightly. This was the first time, he realized, that he had fantasized about Arthur (in his idle time, which was a habit of his to fantasize) and not about his brother. **Artie.**

**That's a first. Congrats, bro. I think you're finally moving on.**

Alfred made a face at the phone and pocketed it, annoyed. It still bothered him to hear his brother say something like that even though it had been almost two months since they started dating other people. He would never quite get over his brother, he thought. Part of him wondered if Matt felt the same about him but he felt too shy to actually ask. He knew his brother would tell him the truth but he was slightly afraid of the answer. He didn't want to find out that he was the only one clinging to the past.

* * *

"What are you sulking about?" Arthur asked as he joined Alfred at the lunch table. Alfred subconsciously looked around for the rest of his friends but recalled that a majority of them didn't have lunch with him anymore. The only other person who did was Kiku but he was at the library trying to catch up on studying last minute for a test in his next block. So that just left Arthur and Alfred to sit together that day, which Alfred was fine with.

"Nothing." He mumbled, making a pouting face. He couldn't help it. He had to solve his issue of his overactive libido without telling Arthur. That was something he could handle himself…he supposed. But Arthur's disbelieving look left Alfred making up another reason. "It's because it's so cold now." He shifted his jacket on his shoulders more. "I hate the cold." It wasn't a lie. With Halloween over and Thanksgiving break approaching it was becoming colder.

"Shouldn't you be accustomed to the cold by now? You've lived this far north for your whole life, after all." Arthur said, as he picked up one of the school's corndogs and took a bite. Alfred watched him.

"It's because I've lived here my whole life that I hate it. I want the heat." He complained but his eyes focused on Arthur's mouth opening to accommodate the girth of the corndog. He stiffened in attention to see Arthur close his mouth around it, about to take a bite, when out of the corner of his eye he saw Alfred watching him. He raised an eyebrow in question. Alfred didn't respond so Arthur pulled the corndog from his mouth.

"What?" He demanded. Alfred snapped out of it and shook his head turning away. Arthur didn't move for a moment, startled before a soft hand was placed on Alfred's arm. Alfred turned to see Arthur giving him a worried look. Fuck, his boyfriend thought that something was the matter. He blushed slightly. He'd gone into 'worried friend' mode. He would get mad if Alfred told him the truth but Alfred couldn't think of a lie to say. "Alfred, whatever's the matter? Is something wrong between you and your brother?"

Alfred shook his head. "It's…not that." He mumbled beating around the bush.

"What is it, then?" Alfred didn't want to answer. He was going to be yelled at. But Arthur was persistent. He had to give in or else Arthur would just continue to worry.

With a sigh he leaned into Arthur's ear and whispered, "I'm super horny right now."

Arthur didn't react for a moment and then his face turned bright red and he shoved Alfred away from him. "Y-YOU-!" He cried but Alfred clamped a hand over Arthur's mouth before he could make a spectacle of himself. Arthur struggled against his hand but Alfred refused to move.

"Shut up!" He begged. "It's not that big of a deal!" Arthur relaxed to the point that he wouldn't screech anymore but he was still angry and flustered.

"You fucker! That's the only reason you were acting this way? You had me worried for no reason! Well I don't care! I don't care at all!" Arthur hissed at him. Alfred sighed.

"It's not like I expected you to help anyway." He said.

Arthur appeared taken aback and then came back angrier. "Are you saying that I couldn't help you at all?" He demanded.

"What? No, that's not what I meant!"

"So what, you're just going to go to Matthew then?" He continued to attack but this attack made him look a little hurt.

Before this could progress any further (this wouldn't be the first time that they had a fight similar to this) Alfred grabbed Arthur's arm and pulled him towards the bathroom. Once inside he pulled him into a large stall and locked it before pinning his boyfriend to the wall and whispering, "Arthur, I won't go to Mattie for my sexual needs anymore. We promised each other that. I promise _you_ that as well. Stop thinking that I'll cheat on you."

Arthur looked away from Alfred's serious face. "How can I help it?" He whispered back. "Matthew's always available to you and I'm…not willing to do much."

Alfred became slightly angry about that. "Matt's not as willing as you think he is! Even if both of us are frustrated, neither of us wants to do anything to each other! We're not…" Alfred searched for a word, "attracted as much to each other as we were in the past. I mean, even if I tried to imagine him it wouldn't have as much of an effect as it would if I imagined you instead!"

Arthur blushed. "Well how was I supposed to know? A-and don't say such things out loud, idiot!"

"I'm whispering." He grinned.

"It's the same difference!" Alfred didn't listen anymore and leaned in to kiss Arthur. Arthur grunted in protest softly before he gave in with reluctance and kissed him back. His arms wrapped around the younger boy's neck and tilted his head to the side to meet Alfred in a slow and sensual kiss. Alfred felt a shiver of want run down his spine and pressed Arthur a bit harder against the wall. Arthur didn't fight back and gasp slightly as his shirt rode up a bit and a small portion of his skin was exposed to the cold temperature of the wall.

Alfred's hands –almost on their own accord- slipped under Arthur's shirt to sneak their way along the senior's abdomen up to his chest. Arthur pulled back quickly and tried to push Alfred away but Alfred didn't want to stop. Not yet. He attached himself to Arthur's neck and sucked just below the boy's ear, his finger twisting Arthur's nipples some. Arthur whimpered and gripped the back of Alfred's head and shirt, turning his head to the side in an effort to escape. But his body was betraying him, pulling Alfred closer to him.

"You seem like you want it too." Alfred murmured almost soundlessly against his neck.

"N-No. Not here, dammit." One of Alfred's hands came down to cup Arthur's growing bulge. Arthur gasped and slapped the hand away. "Stop that!" He said, glaring.

"Dammit, Arthur, I can't help it!" Alfred protested. "I'm freaking horny as hell!"

"That's no excuse!" The two realized their voices were rising and lowered them again quickly. It appeared nobody was in the bathroom. "Take care of yourself, then! At your house!"

"It's no good if I do it myself!" Alfred whined slightly and kissed Arthur again, the pitch of his voice lowering into a seductive one. "It only feels good if someone else does it…"

The reaction was what Alfred wanted as Arthur turned red again and stuttered, "S-S-so? That's not my problem!"

"Please?" He begged and grabbed Arthur's hand to gently lead it to Alfred's problem. "Just touch it some. Just to get me started. I'll handle the rest." Arthur looked like he wanted to continue to protest so Alfred gave him his best pathetic-needy-beggar look. Arthur sighed, embarrassed and gave in.

"J-just some. No more than that, damn it!" Alfred nodded quickly and moaned softly as Arthur began to massage the front of his pants. He leaned his head on his boyfriend's shoulder as Arthur kneaded him, thrusting his hips gently into his hands and picturing the two of them instead in bed together without any clothes standing in their way. Arthur made a soft sound at the thrusting but didn't stop, instead pressing harder. Alfred clung to Arthur's hips in an effort to keep himself grounded even as he felt pleasure curling and building in the pit of his stomach.

He quickly pulled away from Arthur panting and wanted to groan at his own movement, having been so close. His legs were trembling from need. Arthur appeared startled. "I-I'll handle it from here. Thanks for the help, Artie."

Arthur hesitated, seeing that he was being dismissed, and then said, "You don't want me to help anymore?"

Alfred smiled. "We agreed we were taking things slow, you know? So it's okay. I'll do it myself."

Arthur looked annoyed by that. "We've been dating for two months now. I…think it would be fine if I helped you out with something like this." Alfred was surprised. He thought for sure Arthur would just leave the stall to let Alfred handle himself. This was a…pleasant surprise.

"You don't have to…" He half-heartedly protested.

"I-It's fine." Arthur blushed and approached Alfred. He got down on his knees and unzipped Alfred's pants, which shocked Alfred. He hadn't expected to get a blowjob. "This is only because I'm taking responsibility!"

Alfred chuckled, not caring what Arthur's tsundere excuse was. "If you're okay with it!"

"Just keep your voice down."

"Yeah, I know." Arthur looked away as he pulled Alfred out.

"I've never done this before…" Alfred leaned down quickly and pecked his boyfriend on the lips.

"It's okay." He assured him and Arthur nodded before carefully wrapping his lips around Alfred's cock. Alfred scrambled to find purchase on the wall behind him as Arthur tested how much of Alfred he could take in (surprisingly a majority of it but not for long). Arthur then pulled back and licked up the length, being shy about it but slowly gaining confidence as Alfred's body responded to the touches. Alfred's hand carded into Arthur's hair and his gripped it as his boyfriend found it easier for the moment to engulf Alfred. The younger teen arched into his mouth –gagging Arthur some- and squeezed his eyes shut to absorb the feeling. He panted in short, quick breaths as Arthur bobbed until his rapidly approaching end hit him. He covered his mouth with his free hand and bit it as he came, emptying himself without a sound into Arthur's mouth.

Arthur swallowed some but a majority of it escaped him as he pulled back to cough, having not expected Alfred's abrupt end. He coughed and wiped his mouth on the back of his hand. Alfred quickly kneeled next to him. "Sorry," He whispered, "I should've said something first."

"It-" He coughed, "It was rather fast."

Alfred laughed. "Sorry. I wanted you to get me as close as I could handle before I tried to take care of myself." His kissed Arthur's forehead and wiped the boy's mouth of his semen with his thumb. "Thanks, Artie. I feel a lot better now."

"I'm sure." Arthur muttered and pulled Alfred into a kiss. Alfred accepted it before the bell rang for the end of lunch. Arthur pulled away with a curse. "Damn, I didn't get to finish my lunch."

"I'll treat you, okay? Let's go on a date after school!" Alfred said.

Arthur fidgeted happily. "W-Well, it's not like I want to or anything but you do owe me so I guess I'll allow you. Don't think I'm happy, though." Alfred put himself away and pulled him and Arthur to his feet.

"Uh-huh. Anyway, do _you_ need a hand?"

"N-No! I'm fine! Nothing that won't go away!" Arthur said quickly and ran out of the stall. Alfred sighed happily and grinned before following Arthur out.

* * *

**A/N: Rawr, this chapter. Anyway, I'll finally make things more complicated in the next chapter. I swear…  
REVIEW!**


	14. Chapter 13

Alfred was actually rather proud of himself. The group itself was out on the town exploring for the fun of it all. School was tedious and finally Thanksgiving break was upon them. Only two more days and they would have a week off for vacation. And Alfred was rather proud of himself as he managed to walk hand-in-hand with Arthur. He couldn't stop grinning. The autumn air was chilly but Arthur's hand was warm, their finger interlocked. As childish as it was, it thrilled him. He only wanted to hug the hell out of Arthur and never let him go, snuggling against that warmth just to know that he could.

In front them Nicole and Kiku were somewhat awkwardly (really it was on Kiku's part, the poor guy) holding hands as well. Nicole seemed happy enough with it but even after dating her for a short while it still seemed to embarrass Kiku to be openly affectionate with the girl. Alfred couldn't understand how that felt. He loved expressing his emotions…to an extent.

He turned his head to glance back at Gilbert and Matthew who were walking a short ways behind them, talking quietly. Gilbert would grin and say something in a low voice that had Matthew giggling. It was rather cute in its own way. Although to Alfred it was worthy of an eye-roll. He still wasn't completely over that Matthew and Gilbert were together but he wasn't as bothered by it anymore. It was more like a thought of the homework you had to do: it was there and it was an irritant but it was unavoidable. Still, he couldn't help but wonder why Matthew and Gilbert's relationship was such smooth-sailing. Matthew (besides the whole blog issue) didn't seem to have any worries when it came to his boyfriend.

Alfred, on the other foot, seemed to have numerous. The two of them –he and Arthur- always seemed to bicker about little things. Oftentimes (mostly in a non-serious manner) Alfred would bring up, "Well if you don't like it, I guess we can break up!" to Arthur which would cause the older boy to stop and Alfred to win their argument. Arthur never said anything afterwards. Alfred was just happy that he won. What a trump card that was. But Arthur apparently didn't agree. Not at all. But it wasn't until their most recent fight did he state it in a very clear and precise manner.

_Alfred pushed Arthur down onto the bed with their lips locked and their fingers intertwining with each other. Alfred's body was already flushed with pleasure, semi-hard and ready for whatever was to come their way. Today would be the day. He'd never had sex with Arthur before but he was prepared. He even brought his own lube and condom. A thrilling shiver went down his spine as he imagined being hilt-deep inside of Arthur as the boy would moan out his name with that sexy British accent of his._

_Arthur pulled back and panted against Alfred's lips as their hands left each other to instead touch the body of their boyfriend. Arthur's hands rested on Alfred's pectorals, clenching and unclenching the fabric there as Alfred's hands danced down Arthur's sides. Alfred could only imagine how Arthur felt. From what Alfred came to understand in the past two months or so (maybe they were at their third month? He forgot the date too caught up in the situation) was that Arthur was a virgin. Not in everything but Alfred knew he had at least five years of experience on him. Alfred didn't mind, though. It made Arthur's body all the more sensitive to his touches._

_Arthur's eyes closed and Alfred worked quickly to get off Arthur's vest and unbutton the shirt. Arthur hesitated, dropping his hands to say something when Alfred removed his own torso's clothing. Arthur forgot what he wanted to say at the sight, taking the opportunity to touch all that he saw. Alfred shivered and pulled the English boy into a kiss as he pulled their bodies together, aligning them. "Ahh…" Arthur sighed against his mouth as Alfred rolled his hips against his._

_Alfred whimpered a little, ready for more. He was so close to sex. He was giddy at the thought, wanting all of their clothing gone now. "Arthur. Artie, baby…" He whispered and pushed them back down onto Arthur's plush but firm bed. Arthur clicked his tongue at the name, not liking being called it but at the moment Alfred couldn't bring himself to give a fuck. He'd always wanted to call his lover names like such so Arthur would have to deal with it._

_His hands slid down Arthur's chest to the hem of his pants where his fingers began working at the buckle before quickly getting that away. Arthur this time did stop as his pants were opened. Only a little bit more and Alfred could claim his prize-_

"_Alfred, stop." Arthur pushed Alfred's grasping hands away. Alfred was horrified. No! So close! His member practically whined. He felt the need to grind himself against Arthur's ass in his arousal._

"_What? Why?" He asked, looking at his lover. Arthur looked clearly uncomfortable. _

"_I don't want to go that far yet."_

"_What! You've already given me a blowjob! Sex is just like that only it's not your mouth!" He moved forward to kiss Arthur again and continue where they left off with his hands sneaking to his boyfriend's hips but Arthur jerked away._

"_It's a completely different thing, Alfred!" He objected, not letting Alfred touch him. Alfred frowned._

"_No it's not! If anything, blowjobs are more extreme than sex!" He wasn't happy that Arthur was cutting him off. He was aroused and wanted Arthur to satisfy him. He refused to once again have to pleasure himself. He was tired of it. Sex was not extreme in his opinion. It was a very simple thing. It was just a physical act. He didn't understand why Arthur was getting so upset._

"_Come on, Artie!" He whined a bit. "I'll make you feel so good, I swear! It'll be fun and nobody else is here!" He moved forward, deepening his voice in what he hoped was a convincing way. His hand moved forward to cup his boyfriend through his opened pants, making the older boy gasp a bit. "I know you want to!" Arthur was having none of it, though, and pushed Alfred away._

"_I said no!" He glared at him. Alfred grew frustrated._

"_Damn it, Arthur, why not? It's fun and it feels really good! Why are you so against it?"_

"_You always do this!" Arthur cried, angry. "You keep trying to push me into stuff I'm not ready for!"_

"_In the first few minutes of our relationship you jerked yourself off in my lap!" Alfred pointed out. Arthur flushed. "How's that any more-"_

"_That was a fluke! I got away from myself!"_

"_Then do it again! Just loosen up!"_

"_No! I regret what happened that day!" Alfred felt like he had been personally attacked with that comment. He regarded that as up there in his favorite memories. The fact that Arthur regretted it angered him. _

"_So you regret us getting together?"_

"_What?__ Alfred, how the bleeding hell did you come to __that__ conclusion?!" Arthur asked, shocked. Alfred was angry though._

"_If that's the case, then we can just break up!" He didn't have time to react before he was slapped hard across the face, knocking him back on the bed. He jolted up in astonishment, holding his cheek. "Did you just __hit __me?!" He cried. Never before had his trump card failed him._

"_Yes I fucking did!" Arthur yelled at him, shutting the younger boy up. Arthur's eyes were brimming with angry tears, his face the picture of fury. "I'm tired of you toying with our goddamn relationship! If I'm not ready to have sex then you bloody damn well keep your fucking hands to yourself or I will break them off! You cannot just use the excuse of breaking up so lightly, Alfred F. Jones! The fact that you do proves you don't give a flying fuck about us! Well fine! We're OVER! I'm not your fucking boyfriend anymore! Get the hell out of my house!"_

_Alfred stared, his mind processing all that had just happened to him. Arthur was breaking up with him? Wait, no…No, that's not what he wanted. Not at all. He had been lying! "No, Arthur, wait-"_

"_Get OUT!" Arthur screamed at him, pointing to the door._

_Alfred grabbed him and hugged him. "No! I'm sorry! I didn't mean it!" Arthur struggled in his arms, trying to shove him off and pounding on his back. "Take it back! I don't want to let you go! I'm sorry!"_

_Arthur stopped fighting against him and panted from his anger and exertion. "You…You're not allowed to ever make that statement again unless you mean it." He said, referring to them breaking up._

"_I won't."_

"_And if I tell you not to do something when we're doing something like this then you must stop." He continued._

"_I will, I swear." He buried his face into Arthur's shoulder. Arthur sighed and finally hugged him back. Alfred's face stung and his body trembled slightly. He was scared. Terrified, in fact, which surprised him some. He had never expected to be so scared at the thought of losing Arthur. But the thought of his relationship ending with Arthur was almost as bad as when he discovered he didn't love Matthew the same way anymore. _

Alfred shook himself out of his memory. He and Arthur'd had a long talk after that discussing their relationship. His whole vision on relationships, he discovered, was rather warped. When it came to him and his brother Matthew the moment they started doing anything sexual everything was high speed at the wheel. Anything was allowed. But according to Arthur, that's not how everyone was. Arthur considered sex to be a very important step in a relationship and didn't want to go there yet so soon.

_"But you're okay with blowjobs?" Alfred asked, confused about Arthur's priorities._

_Arthur blushed. "W-well, I mean, on occasion…but not all of the time!"_

_"Okay, am I allowed to you know, touch you sexually?" Alfred tilted his head a little in question. Arthur turned his head away, shy before confirming that he could._

Alfred realized that day that even though he was so far ahead physically than Arthur, maturity-wise he wasn't. He had so much to learn. He didn't realize that everyone had many different boundary levels. He had assumed that all sexual things were okay once the okay was given. He sighed some and gripped Arthur's hand tighter, causing the boy to look at him. He smiled some at him.

Arthur raised an eyebrow. "Yes?"

Alfred shook his head. "No, it's nothing."

* * *

Gilbert walked over to Alfred, Arthur, and Kiku as the three boys were sitting together waiting for the others. He appeared distraught, which caused Alfred to raise an eyebrow. Gilbert didn't become distraught. Nothing fazed him in such a way. Yes, he saw him get upset but not distraught. Alfred coughed as the Prussian joined them.

"Shit, man, were you smoking?" He asked. Beside him Arthur frowned.

"What's the matter?" He asked seriously.

Gilbert glanced at the three of them before finally looking at Arthur. "Can I talk to you for a moment? Alone?" Alfred blinked at the proposal. Arthur stood up immediately.

"Of course." The two walked off. Alfred looked at Kiku.

"What's up with that?" Kiku appeared just as confused, frowning.

"I'm…unsure…" He watched them. Alfred did too. Gilbert's head was close to Arthur's talking quickly. Arthur wasn't responding, only listening with a frown. Alfred made a small face that Gilbert was so close to his boyfriend. He already had Matthew; he didn't need to take another one of his lovers. He shook his head to clear the idea.

Arthur stared Gilbert down as the boy stopped talking. He seemed to be considering something before he opened his mouth and responded, glancing at Alfred. Alfred straightened, realizing that he was involved in this conversation. It made his curiosity spike. Gilbert shook his head and waved his hand towards Kiku and Alfred and then in the general direction of the closest school building, talking quickly again. Arthur shook his head with a sigh. Gilbert calmed and gazed at him for a period of time before he asked one last thing. Arthur shook his head once more. Gilbert sighed and nodded before glancing at the school and leaving towards it. Arthur watched him before walking back over to his friends.

"What was that about?" Alfred asked immediately. Arthur didn't respond for a time.

"…Gilbert has…" He shook his head. "No, never mind. Find out from your brother, Alfred. Really he's the only one who can tell you Gilbert's decision."

"What are you talking about?" He asked, baffled. Kiku seemed to understand, though.

"Was it bad?" The Asian asked.

"Surprising, chilling, but he hasn't found out the worst yet." Arthur looked down. "The worst is to come…"

"Guys come one!" Alfred whined. "Don't leave me in the dark!" But they did so anyway.

* * *

That night Matthew and Alfred sat together in the living room on their crappy couch cuddling together. The heating was a little bad in their cheap apartment so they shared the large cover they had for their bed between them, watching an action movie. Alfred buried a chilled nose into the back of his brother's neck, causing the Canadian to gasp a bit.

"Al! Don't do that!" The boy complained.

"My nose is cold." Alfred responded simply, ignoring his brother's complaints in favour of a warm nose. He snuggled against him, spooning his older (not that he would admit it to anyone) brother contently before focusing back on the movie. Matthew disregarded Alfred. Alfred gasped slightly as something vibrated against his crotch. "Ah!" He blushed slightly. "Matt, do you have some kind of sex toy back there?"

Matthew elbowed his brother lightly and dug between them to grab at his phone. Alfred grinding himself against the hand teasingly before laughing at his brother's glare. Matt was fun to tease. The boy's hand removed his cell phone and began typing on it. Alfred settled himself against his brother again comfortably and lifted the boy's shirt slightly to rub the lower half of his abdomen with his thumb in a comforting gesture –like a child who would suck their thumb while cuddling a teddy bear. Matt stiffened slightly against him but Alfred ignored it.

"…Al…" his brother began, catching Alfred's attention, "do you know if Gilbert's figured it out about us or not?"

"I don't _think_ so. Why?" Alfred asked absently, concentrating on the movie. Matthew didn't respond and instead looked back at the movie as well waiting for his next text. When it arrived Matthew gasped between his teeth, getting Alfred to jerk up slightly to read the text.

**We need to talk.** It said. Alfred stared at the text and then saw it was from Gilbert.

"Relax, Matt." He immediately said hugging his brother as the boy stared at the text. "It'll be fine." Alfred and Matthew both knew what those words meant in a relationship. He kissed his brother's cheek. "It's probably not as bad as we think it is."

"But what if it is?" Matthew asked, looking at his brother with fearful eyes. Alfred recognized that fear. It was the same thing he experienced when he thought he and Arthur were breaking up. He pecked Matthew on the lips quickly.

"It's not. I swear it won't be." He grinned, somewhat threateningly. "Gilbert doesn't have the balls to break up with you. I'll break his face if he does!" A hint of a smile appeared on Matt's face but he was still worried. "Let's just keep watching the movie. Tell him you'll meet up with him somewhere tomorrow."

"He's coming over." Matthew said.

"He knows where we live?"

"I gave him the address…"

"Okay…" Alfred didn't know how else to respond. They went back to watching the movie anyhow, if somewhat nervously. Both brothers didn't know how to act at the moment but for good measure they silently agreed to remove themselves from each other. They both sat shoulder-to-shoulder instead with the blanket shared between them. That way Gilbert wouldn't get too upset seeing them together. It was better they didn't push anything.

Fifteen minutes later there was a knock at the door. The twins glanced at each other before Matthew decidedly got up to answer the door with his brother watching, the movie now paused. The door opened to reveal a bundled Gilbert. Behind him a light flurry blew outside. Alfred frowned at the sight. He didn't like flurries. Gilbert appeared serious, looking between the two brothers for a moment before back to Matthew.

"Hey." He greeted.

"Um, hi Gil. What's up?" Matthew asked with a small smile. Gilbert didn't smile back.

"Can you come outside for a minute? _Alone_?" He seemed to stress the word more than he needed to with a slight glare at Alfred. Alfred stiffened along with his brother.

"Ah, yeah, just a moment let me get a jacket." Matthew hurried to the closet to grab a light jacket (how he could stand the cold so easily, Alfred couldn't fathom) before he exited the door with Gilbert. Alfred instantly was out of his seat as soon as the door closed and pressed his eye to the peep hole. He could see Matthew and Gilbert walking down the stairs so when he thought it was safe he grabbed his jacket and put it on before sneaking after them in sandals (_Fuck!_), hiding behind a pillar to listen in on the conversation.

"Is, um, something wrong?" Matthew asked his boyfriend after they stopped. Gilbert wasn't looking at him. Instead he was clenching his fists and staring to the side. Finally he stuffed his fists into his jacket and glared at Matthew.

"What is this?" He demanded.

Matthew frowned. "'This'? What, this conversation?" He asked lightly. "Because I don't know-"

"No, not this conversation. This. Us. What are we to you?"

"…" Matthew didn't respond. Alfred could tell that his brother was thinking about how to word his next statement while also trying to figure out what Gilbert was thinking. "We're…boyfriends, yes?"

"Really? Because I'm pretty fucking sure boyfriends don't cheat on here." Gilbert narrowed his eyes and Matthew's widened. "Especially with past lovers."

"Gil-"

"We had just gotten together, Matthew." Alfred flinched as well as Matt as Gilbert used Matthew's actual name instead of a nickname. He was angry. "We had just gotten together and already you fucking cheated."

"Gilbert, wait-" Matt tried to interrupt. Gilbert wouldn't listen, a tirade coming.

"We had _just_ gotten together! I _told_ you that I've liked you for a while! Were you playing with my feelings? Was it all a joke? Or do you actually love Alfred more than me? Am I second place for you?" He demanded.

"No!" Matthew shook his head. Alfred could see his brother was very upset. "Gilbert, it was never like that!"

"You stated specifically that your brother was more important!" Gilbert accused.

Matthew bit his lip for a second, close to tears, "B-Because he is! He's my brother-"

"So you admit it!"

"I can't help it! He's all I've had for so long!"

"How the hell are we supposed to be in a relationship when he's more important than I am!"

"Isn't Ludwig more important to you?" Matthew pleaded.

"I'm not talking about in terms of brothers." Gilbert said coldly. "I'm talking about lovers. He's your past lover, Matthew. And you love him more."

"Because he's my brother." Matthew whispered pathetically, unable to fight back. He was trapped in corner.

Gilbert's jaw clenched. "Is that all you have to say? He's your 'brother'? Because brothers aren't fucking lovers. It's not normal!" Matthew didn't respond. Alfred's fingers clenched the pillar he was hiding behind. That fucking bastard. "He's one or the other, Matthew! He can't be both!"

"He's my brother." Matthew whispered again.

"But you had sex with him. Only a couple months ago. The same day we got together. You cheated on me almost immediately." Gilbert whispered back, his maroon eyes hard as he glared Matthew down.

"…Yes."

"I think we're done here." Gilbert turned to leave when Matthew rushed him and grabbed his shoulder, trembling.

"No! Gilbert, please don't go! Please, let me explain!" Gilbert swirled around and slapped the hand away. Matthew immediately flinched back and cowered some. Alfred's sucked in a breath between his teeth seeing the same eyes Matthew always had when their father raged at him.

"No! I don't date cheaters! I _trusted_ you! We're done! Fuck this shit!" Gilbert grabbed his hat that he was wearing and threw it down before storming off. Matthew was shaking badly, his breath coming in quick pants. His mouth moved watching his ex-boyfriend no doubt desperately trying to call him back. But Matthew couldn't get enough air in his lungs. He was hyperventilating.

Alfred rushed him and skidded down next to him to wrap his arms around his brother. "Breathe!" He begged, holding his shaking form. "Matt, breathe!" Matthew was rocking back and forth in Alfred's arms, his eyes wide and still staring at where Gilbert left. "MATT!" Alfred yelled. Matthew's eyes finally snapped to Alfred's terrified ones and a large breath was sucked in. Instantly he began to sob shuddering cries. Alfred clung to him as his brother began to wail into his jacket. Alfred closed his eyes and began to cry too, feeling his brother's pain.

"Gilbert!" Matthew cried out into his twin's chest, his fingers biting into his brother's arms. "GILBERT!"

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry…!" Alfred sobbed against Matthew's hair. This was his fault.

"Gilbert…!" Alfred vowed to himself that he would never forgive himself for what he had done.

* * *

**A/N: Wow, I am SO sorry for how late this is. I never meant for it to take over a month to come out. I just had, like, NO muse at all for this. Luckily I found a decent one. Again I'm sorry. I'm going to try desperately to get out Pirate Ages and Cursed: Beloved 's next chapters as soon as I can.**

**Review please! (You know that you want to. I mean, fuck, look at all of the reason I gave you to in this chapter. ;D )**


	15. Chapter 14

Matthew didn't go to school, despite the fact that it was basically a free day. Alfred didn't blame him. Hell, he didn't even want to go to school. But one of them needed to go and Alfred had a job he needed to do. He needed to beat the shit out of Gilbert…no….he needed to talk to him…no, he needed to avoid him….no, he- Alfred scrubbed his hair hard, showering for the morning. He couldn't do any of that. He needed to talk to Gilbert but he didn't want to. It was too nerve-wracking. But he couldn't avoid him either. Something needed to be done and Alfred needed to take responsibility. After all, this was entirely his fault. And that just made the guilt build up even more in his chest. He was terrified. He didn't know what to do with this kind of situation.

Alfred couldn't face his brother and only muttered a goodbye before he left the house to go to school. Upon arriving he glanced at where his friends usually met up in the classroom but saw that Gilbert was already there with Nicole. His feet immediately veered off their intended course and he half began to run in a different direction but he slammed into a figure and fell to the ground. "Ow!"

"Alfred, good Lord, watch where you're going!" Alfred looked up as he recognized Arthur's voice. Arthur was helping the smaller senior Kiku to his feet where Alfred had practically run him over. The glare on his boyfriend's face had Alfred unwillingly flinching, remembering things that he really wished he wasn't. Arthur didn't notice but Kiku did.

"No, it's fine. I am alright." Kiku looked at Alfred, worried. "Are you alright?" Arthur frowned and looked at Kiku and then Alfred, only just realizing the panicked look on the sophomore's face. Alfred stood up quickly.

"Yeah! …No…" He admitted and glanced back at the classroom before grabbing Arthur and Kiku's hands and dragging them down the hallway. He needed help, he decided. He needed someone to talk to about this and Mattie was too torn up to discuss any sort of plan to fix things. He led them (despite Arthur's minor protests about being dragged around) outside and around the building so that they were secluded from other students. He then turned to his friends to take a breath to begin talking when he froze. What if Kiku and Arthur were on Gilbert's side? What if they didn't care about Alfred's reasoning at all? Maybe they thought that Alfred and Matthew deserved it? Oh god, maybe they thought _Matthew deserved it! _He was suddenly angry at the thought. His brother didn't deserve this. None of this was his fault, in Alfred's opinion. Nobody should take the blame but Alfred himself. How dare they accuse his brother!

"Alfred," Arthur reached a hand out and gently touched Alfred's forearm, giving him a worried look. Kiku was giving him a similar one as well. All of Alfred's anger rushed out of him. What was he thinking? Arthur…no, at least Kiku wouldn't do that. Kiku would be kind to him no matter what. After all, Kiku was his best friend. Arthur wouldn't be too angry either, hopefully. They all knew that this was coming. They knew that Gilbert would find out eventually. If Kiku or Arthur were going to blame Matthew, they would have done so already. He took a deep breath to calm himself.

_I need to trust my friends more._ Alfred mentally noted. But it was hard for him. So hard… "Gilbert and Mattie broke up last night." He stated.

Both of the other boys only looked mildly surprised, confusing Alfred. "I see…" Kiku murmured and looked down, thinking.

Arthur sighed and slid his hand down to gently grip Alfred's. Alfred unwillingly –and uncharacteristically- blushed at the contact, but felt his insides warm at the comfort. He took the hand fully and held it, moving a little closer to his boyfriend. Arthur didn't often make the first move. "I had suspected he would do so." Arthur admitted and gazed at Alfred. "We talked about it the other day."

Alfred looked at him, remembering the day Gilbert had called Arthur out. "What did you guys talk about?" He demanded.

"Nothing, really. Gilbert informed me about how he realized that Canada and America are you two. It shocked him because he hadn't expected something like that and he wanted to know my opinion on it all since I was in the same situation he was."

"What did you say?"

Arthur ignored him and continued. "He was more confused than angry. But I explained to him my thoughts and he agreed after a moment before leaving. I didn't think he would really break up over this but I knew things would not be well when he found out about the sex." Arthur looked away. Alfred had the distinct impression something was wrong with him but Kiku interrupted his train of thoughts.

"Have you talked to Gilbert yet?" The Asian boy asked. Alfred shook his head and fidgeted with his fingers.

"I…don't know what to do. That's why I wanted to ask you guys."

Kiku looked to Arthur. "You have been his friend the longest amount of time." Arthur nodded in agreement. "What do you think?"

"Don't talk to Gilbert about this. He's irrational when his trust has been betrayed or when he's angry. It's even worse when it's both combined. He won't talk to you and most likely it'll only end up as a brawl. I'll talk to him. After all, this is my fault as well."

"What! It's not!" Alfred denied, shaking his head quickly.

Arthur gave him a stern look. "It is. This is a side-effect to my own actions –although the misunderstanding is yours in its entirety." Alfred pinked a bit at the memory. "A gentleman wouldn't allow his lover to handle things on his own. I'll talk to Gilbert." He turned and walked away before either of the other two boys could respond. Alfred stared after him with a mixture of emotions. He was happy that Arthur was willing to help him and stunned that his boyfriend could be so mature. But at the same time he was stung by his comments. Arthur really was an adult, Alfred realized. Soon enough the boy would be eighteen.

Alfred had never felt so young before.

* * *

Arthur didn't get the chance to fully discuss anything with Gilbert that last day of school. The older boy stayed away from his friends, seething. Arthur could physically see it in his form as the Prussian tried not to look at Alfred or look for Matthew. Instead he sat with his younger brother Ludwig and his friends. Arthur frowned, but didn't feel the need to pursue him. He needed to approach the beast in a comfortable setting, which meant Arthur needed to visit his house.

Arthur left school without talking to Alfred either and went straight to his car. He took his time sitting there and gazing at the clock on the dashboard. He had a few minutes in which he wanted to wait for Gilbert to make it home and get settled in. When he had achieved that time, he pulled his car out and drove to his best friend's house. Gilbert's house was similar to Arthur's in size, although it was a bit more compact. There were fewer rooms than in Arthur's house and the house itself was painted a grey colour. The roof was black but if one knew where to look (i.e. everyone who had been there when it had occurred -namely Arthur, Ludwig, and Gilbert) there were two large flags painted onto the roof for the German and Prussian household.

Arthur let himself in and took off his shoes. Ludwig was already at the stove with his apron on beginning to cook dinner. His father usually arrived home later in the day so usually the younger of the brothers cooked dinner merely because Gilbert was often too lazy to do so himself. The German boy glanced at Arthur's entrance, looking slightly annoyed by Arthur just coming into the house but throwing a greeting at him anyway. Ludwig was no doubt still upset about the fight he and Arthur (and a few other kids) got into a couple years back when Arthur and Gilbert had been in their first year of high school. Arthur was still going through his rebellious phase back then and his friends hadn't liked it and they often fought. Arthur eventually won but he still gave up his punk lifestyle, finding it too harsh on his body to handle anymore (it didn't help that he came close to being raped but that's another story for a different time). Still, Ludwig never fully forgave him and the two of them had another fight in tenth grade but eventually the fighting was resolved with tension still on both sides.

Arthur greeted him back and made his way casually to Gilbert's room. He knocked on the door. "_Was ist es, Luddy_? _Sie brauchen meine Hilfe?_" Gilbert called out.

"It's Arthur." Arthur stated. There was silence for a long period of time before movement was heard as the bed squeaked. The door opened slowly to reveal an unhappy Gilbert.

"What do you want?" The boy asked staring him down. Arthur could already tell Gilbert was accusing him but was trying not to fully get angry at him until he was sure.

"I just want to hear your side of the story, is all." Arthur said and gently tried to move past Gilbert. After a slight hesitation Gilbert allowed him to enter. The room was a complete mess with clothes thrown about everywhere. Arthur could spot bits of things he'd rather not see (_Dear Lord, is that a crop? When did he get that- No, never mind_) as well as some food wrappers from various candies. He spotted Gilbird –yes, Gilbert actually _did_ name his little chick that, unfortunately- by the window and the little bird fluttered over to land on Arthur's shoulder and nuzzle his cheek affectionately. Arthur petted it a little before sitting down at the computer chair and spinning to face his host, waiting.

Gilbert didn't make him wait long. "I can't believe this bullshit! Why didn't you tell me that the two of them had sex!?" He yelled.

Arthur didn't flinch. "Because it was better if you read it from Matthew's own words."

"The fucker cheated on me!"

"And Alfred cheated on me."

"You two weren't even together!"

"Good point, but we may as well have been if Alfred's actions were any indication."

"I'm going to punch that fucking American in the face! This is his fucking fault!"

"Then why don't you? You can blame him instead of Matthew."

Gilbert glared at him hard, but warily. "You're siding with them." He accused.

Arthur responded calmly, "Actually, I'm quite on your side about this." Gilbert blinked, startled. Arthur stood and began walking around, gazing at the dark blue –nearly black- walls to see the posters and pictures hanging there. He found one with Gilbert, Francis, and Antonio (the three of them being very bad friends who were more likely to cause trouble for each other than those around them than have a normal friendly time) dressed as if for a band and posing with instruments. He scoffed and continued on with what he was saying, "You're not the only one upset. While I may have forgiven Alfred for what he has done, the point of the matter is I'm the only one who could possibly understand your situation." He turned to Gilbert and gave him a soft smile. "And besides, you're my best mate."

Gilbert looked relieved and grinned at him. "So what are we going to do then?"

"Do? Nothing, I suppose. What is there _to_ do?" Arthur retaliated. Gilbert frowned and thought about it. He didn't reply, though. "There's really only one thing to do: You can either stay broken up with Matthew, or you can forgive him and try to make a relationship work out." Gilbert glared at him again and opened his mouth to argue when Arthur continued to finish loudly, "Either way you must talk to Matthew. The sake of our group depends on it." Gilbert's mouth shut again. "And while I am quite upset over this matter, I don't want to lose Alfred. I…care for him, after all. And if your relationship is ruined forever with Matthew, Alfred will leave along with him. We both know this for a fact."

"Because they love each other more than us." Gilbert growled bitterly.

Arthur nodded in agreement. "But…" He said softly, "That is not their fault. Do you understand why?"

"Yeah, I get why!" Gilbert scowled and threw his hands up before he stalked over to the corner and back, pacing some. "I understand that fucking blog completely! But that doesn't mean I'm fucking happy about it!"

Arthur frowned a little, perplexed. "If you understand their predicament, why do you still hate Matthew for loving Alfred more if it's only in a brotherly manner?"

"Because Matt and Al were fucking lovers! They're still living together! What's to say they're not fucking each other right now?"

"Because Matthew would not do that to you." Arthur answered quietly.

"That's what I thought and yet the blog says differently." Gilbert responded coldly. Arthur could see there would be no reasoning with Gilbert today. He would have to try another day.

"I understand." He moved to the door. "I must get home now. Mum is cooking a roast tonight and I must get my homework done before my siblings return home."

Gilbert chuckled a bit. "Those three still harassing you?"

Arthur rolled his eyes. "You have _no_ idea." He joked a bit, "I swear that my sister should've been born a boy. She's almost the worst of the three."

"Her boobs still big?"

"Not in the slightest." Arthur leaned against the door and smirked at Gilbert. He knew that Gilbert had once had feelings for his sister but it was a passing crush. After all, he fell for her when he was going through his awkward puberty phase. Personally Arthur didn't see the appeal in her at all. Her breasts were still only a B-cup and Arthur himself preferred somewhere between and C- and a D-cup on the women he liked. That was actually where he and his eldest brother got along. Looking at porn with him and talking to each other about which women looked the best was an on-going monthly tradition between the two of them.

Gilbert scoffed. "You can't appreciate nice breasts."

"Elizabeta's are a C-cup." Arthur commented lightly, bringing up Gilbert's old friend and ex-girlfriend.

"She's an exception. Smaller ones that fit perfectly in your hands are better."

"Never." Arthur disagreed and opened the door. Gilbert saw him out. "Good bye, then. And remember that you're not the only one with a broken heart, Gilbert." Arthur said at the last moment before he closed the door.

* * *

Alfred could hear Matthew crying in the bedroom. His cries were as soft as they ever were –a trait they had both picked up from their childhood- but Alfred could easily pick them up. He could recognize his brother's voice anywhere no matter how soft. His heart twisted but he dare not go comfort him. Mattie had actually rejected his comfort earlier. It had stung and Matthew had immediately recognized it.

"_O-Oh, Al…" His brother's eyes leaked a couple tears as he appeared as distraught as Alfred looked and no doubt felt because of Matthew's rejection, "Al, I'm sorry. I-I'm sorry, but I can't. I'm scared. Gilbert left because of….that…I'm scared to do so anymore!"_

Alfred had understood and left him alone to go out into the living room. He buried his face into his knees. Why had this happened? Gilbert had torn his brother. Matthew didn't even want to be touched by Alfred anymore. Alfred had only wanted to hold him, though. It made his heart ache and he gave a dry sob. His brother had been taken away from him. He was fully Gilbert's now, he realized. Matthew didn't love him anymore. He wanted Gilbert more. But Alfred still wanted him. He wanted his brother. He wanted to hold him and kiss him and heal his heart. He was the only one who could fix him, right? So why did Matthew want Gilbert more? Matthew was his. Alfred and Matthew. Matthew and Alfred. They were two halves of the same whole. But now Matthew was gone. His heart had been captured by Gilbert. He was out of Alfred's reach.

"He's mine." Alfred growled into his legs. "Mine, mine, mine, mine, Gilbert! Give him back!" He gripped his legs tightly. They would leave, he decided. He would take Matthew and run far away with him. He could forcibly take Matthew back. That's all he had to do! It was so easy! Spurred on, Alfred jumped to his feet and hurried to the bedroom. He would take Matthew far away so that they could be together forever. It would only be the two of them again. Nobody else could hurt them!

Suddenly Alfred froze his hand near the doorknob. No, what was he thinking? Was he an idiot? He couldn't do that. It wasn't that simple. This wasn't like running away from their parents. They had people who actually cared for them here. Alfred had a best friend, Kiku. And Kiku had a girlfriend who was also Alfred's friend, Nicole. And although Alfred was mad at him, Gilbert was his friend too. And there were others at the school Alfred loved talking to. And then there was Arthur. Oh god, and then there was Arthur…

Alfred pressed his head against door softly. He couldn't leave. As much as he loved Matthew, he loved Arthur too. Arthur had his heart, just as Matthew's heart was held by Gilbert. These thoughts of possession, Alfred insightfully came to grasp, were not his own. They were a knee-jerk reaction to their well-being being hurt. A sob escaped his chest. He loved Arthur but he wanted to help Matthew. He couldn't like this. He couldn't have any distractions. He needed his heart to be focused on one thing, so Alfred left the house and began running to the park, pulling out his cell phone and asking Arthur to meet him there. Arthur agreed and Alfred hung up the phone crying softly.

He arrived at the park first and went into the restroom to splash water on his face and clean it. He didn't need others seeing his tears. He exited the restroom with only slightly red eyes and sat down on the swing set. He had a few minutes and he didn't want to think so he pushed off of the swing and began swinging back and forth. He got higher and higher and leaned back so that his feet would hit a few of the low-hanging branches of the tree reaching towards the swing set. He smiled as his foot hit it a couple times and then he decidedly jumped off of the swing to land a good couple feet away from the playground equipment. He heard clapping and saw Arthur approaching him with a small smile, clapping for him. Alfred's heart skipped a beat at the sight for various reasons and he stood up fully as Arthur came up to him.

"Hey." He said softly.

"Hello." Arthur responded.

Alfred stood awkwardly for a few moments, flailing mentally about what to say. Finally he took a deep breath and steeled himself emotionally and mentally, closing his eyes until he released the breath. He opened them and met Arthur's beautiful green eyes and took a quick breath. "Arthur, I want to break up." He said breathlessly.

Arthur gazed at him for a heartbeat longer before nodding. "If that's what you want." He responded quietly. Alfred's heart gave a sad leap that had tears spring to his eyes but he quickly blinked them away.

"You're not upset?" He choked out.

Arthur shook his head. "I already understand. You love your brother." Arthur looked up at him with a sad smile. "I knew that this day would come. It's part of the reason I didn't want to have sex with you."

Alfred hugged him close. "Don't say that." He begged. "I love you."

Arthur rubbed his back. "But you love your brother more."

"I…" Alfred struggled to say it out loud. It killed a part of him to say it even though he knew it was true. It was just too difficult for him to let things go sometimes, "I don't." He whispered. "I love you more." He pulled away slightly and grabbed Arthur's hand to press it to Alfred's own chest over his heart. Alfred grinned shakily. "It's yours, alright?" Arthur stared at him, stunned. "But Mattie is my brother. I love him too, even if I love you more. But he needs me more right now and I can't have my thoughts split, y'know?"

Arthur's eyes drifted to where Alfred still held Arthur's head. "I understand." He said. "This is temporary, yes?"

"Only until Mattie doesn't need me as much." Alfred agreed and hoped that time would be soon. Arthur nodded.

"Kiss me, then. I need to be held off, after all." Alfred laughed at that and leaned down slightly to meet Arthur in a hot kiss. Arthur threw his arms over his ex-boyfriend's shoulders and pulled him close, immediately forcing the younger boy's mouth open. Alfred groaned at his forcefulness, feeling his loins stir in response. He pressed Arthur against the pole of the swing set and pressed their bodies flush together as their mouths and tongues moved with each other trying to get as much out of the kiss as they could before they had to separate. Alfred was forced to breathe through his nose. He had to put effort into not attacking Arthur's neck as his hands slipped some under Arthur's sweater. He felt the skin there and massaged it with his thumbs before finally they broke the kiss.

Arthur gazed at Alfred with dark, half-mast jade eyes the two boys panted and continued to hang onto each other. Alfred could already tell he was semi-hard and resisted the urge to grind against his ex-boyfriend. He couldn't resist stealing another kiss, though. "Fuck, Arthur." He gasped against his lips before he trailed himself over to Arthur's ear and spoke into it, "I wanna have sex with you so bad." He whimpered.

"Too bad, love." Arthur responded although Alfred felt a shiver of pleasure run through the older boy's body. He gently pushed Alfred away. "Perhaps when we get back together."

"I'll hold you to that." Alfred promised. He touched Arthur's hand once and the two shared a longing look, neither wanting to leave that moment. Alfred knew that after this he wouldn't be allowed to kiss Arthur. He also wouldn't be able to touch him, or hold his hand, or tease him, or go on dates with him. He was back to square one by choice.

"I'll work on Gilbert." Arthur said. "You should work on Matthew." Alfred nodded.

"…I'll see you at school next week?"

"Make sure you bring Matthew as well."

"Okay."

* * *

**A/N: Fuuuuuuck, it's been over a month. OTL Well here's your update guys! Sorry I didn't get to it sooner! I'm curious to see your reactions to…everyone's side of this story. Sorry about randomly switching to Arthur's POV but we wanted to see what was happening with Gilbert, right? Right? Of course you did, you silly silly duckies you.**

**Anyway, make sure you drop me a review!**


	16. Chapter 15

**A/N: Hello, duckies. Well, here I am again. Typing this way late. Been stuck in a good rut, I have. No motivation whatsoever. Everything grinded to a halt. Luckily a good fanfiction kick started my gears again so here we go!**

**A lot of you wanted some more PruCan (although I've had a few complaints about the pairing but meh, s'my story) so for now I'll write this from Gilbert's point of view. I need a little freshness in life.**

* * *

_When Gilbert had first met Matthew he thought he was a quiet guy. And quite frankly he seemed rather un-awesome. The boy barely talked and that was saying something considering that Gilbert hung out with Kiku –who was practically the quietest guy a majority of the time sans when talking about anime or video games. Gilbert wasn't all that impressed with Matthew but had a hell of a time chatting with his twin brother Alfred. The boy loved to talk and Gilbert's excitement level was right up there with him. Their egos also came close to matching and bickering became a fun game among the two for the first couple days they knew each other. Alfred kept trying to get Matthew to talk more and the other brother did occasionally say something. His voice was soft and had a slight Canadian lilt to it. Gilbert became interested in him. He wanted to hear him talk more. Gilbert had joined in with Al on trying to get Matthew to talk._

_Over time the boy opened up a bit more. It was a slow pace, that was for sure, but it happened in a quite extraordinary way. Gilbert didn't often read people but he liked to occasionally pay attention to those around him, especially if it related to his friends. He could tell that the twins were very close to each other. Hell, they may have been closer to each other than Gilbert and his younger brother Ludwig were (and that was saying something because Gilbert cherished his little brother –even if he liked to rile him up on occasion)! He also noticed that Matthew wasn't used to talking to other people. Maybe he was introverted and his brother was extroverted? Quite the match-up. Maybe all twins were like that? After all the Vargas twins seemed to be opposites as well. The introvertedness made Gilbert want to pry. He wanted to open this boy up and discover his secrets._

_Matthew was a good cook. He had discovered this when the twin had brought a homemade lunch to school. Not surprisingly it was Canadian food with a mixture of American food. The twins had shared it. Over time Matthew occasionally kept doing this and as the group of friends (Arthur, Alfred, Nicole, Kiku, Gilbert, and Matthew that is) became closer, Gilbert felt he had the right to pick off of their plate._

_"Hey!" Alfred had cried as Gilbert snatched up a piece of the homemade "pigs in a blanket" (no doubt Alfred's choice) and popped it into his mouth. He chewed and was surprised that the biscuit covering of the hotdog was not flavored the way it usually was. It had a flavored that tingled Gilbert's tongue with a spicy-sweetness that seemed to blend far too well with the biscuit and hotdog flavor. No doubt that this wasn't Pillsbury._

_"This is great!" Gilbert exclaimed and grinned. "Did you make this yourself?" He asked Matthew._

_Matthew fumbled with his words for a moment, almost surprised that Gilbert seemed to be talking directly to him in such an excited manner (how strange that he still wasn't used to it even though it had been a while since the boys had arrived). "Ah…y-yes." He said in his soft voice, nervous. Gilbert wanted to snap him out of it and leaned closer into his face._

_"Can you make me lunch sometime? The shit they serve here sucks!" Matthew grew a tiny bit more flustered (Hey, he looks kind of cute like that!) and looked down with slightly pink cheeks._

_"A-Ah…"_

_"Gilbert, you can't just force him to make food for you!" Arthur, Gilbert's best friend, scolded from next to him glaring at him. The boy had finally given in and joined the group not too long ago and he and Alfred had just broken away from one of their (what Gilbert and Nicole called it) "lover's quarrels" at the scene._

_"Yeah!" Alfred agreed, surprising Arthur that he was actually being agreed with by this boy._

_"No…It's alright." Matthew spoke up, raising his voice slightly to be heard over them. He smiled at Gilbert for the first time. "I'll bring some tomorrow for you, is that alright?" Gilbert smiled back and realized that he wanted to make Matthew smile more._

* * *

Gilbert turned his head on his bed to gaze at Arthur as the boy sat knitting (like the pussy he is, kesesese) on the floor next to him. They were in his bedroom after a cleaning spree (Gilbert had grown tired of how messy his room was and Arthur was unwillingly forced to join in the cleaning) relaxing afterwards. It was Thanksgiving Break so they both had a week to chill. Neither felt inclined to invite their other friends over. Gilbert and Arthur had been friends the longest after all and had grown together through awkward adolescent ages. That brought two boys together.

His eyes stayed fixated on what Arthur was knitting before he finally spoke his thoughts. "How can you stand it?"

"Stand what?" Arthur asked, not bothering to look up.

"Your relationship with Al." The name was still bitter on his tongue. He could still remember when he had read the blog page in Matt's words. He could remember his disgust at the image of the two of them having sex (Alfred and Matthew, not Gilbert and Matthew) in that apartment. It sickened him.

Arthur sighed through his nose and Gilbert could sense the melancholy in his next words, having known his friend for so long, "Quite the contrary, I can hardly stand it as well." He didn't turn to look at his friend and continued his knitting, although it was slower now as his mind became occupied with other thoughts. "I don't…like having Alfred and Matthew in such a relationship. It makes me horribly jealous. But what can I do? I understand their 'love' for each other and accept that. I'm not happy about it but I do." Gilbert rolled onto his side to gaze at the back of Arthur's head, frowning at his words. He had a feeling that his friend had been holding these thoughts to himself. It wasn't often the stubborn Brit actually opened up to people and exposed his true feelings. He would need to listen closely lest Arthur closed up suddenly again. He was like a clam that way. "But Alfred assures me that they don't love each other in a lover's way anymore. They even said so in the blog." His voice became a little softer and he lowered his knitting. "But…I still can't help but feel insecure. After all, they've known each other their whole lives. What's to say that they won't just up and decide they want each other more?"

"Nothing." Gilbert agreed solemnly. Arthur really did see where he was coming from. For the first time Gilbert realized that Arthur was in the exact same boat as him. There were two halves to this lover's conundrum and Arthur was on the other side. He felt as if a portion of the burden and guilt and anger he felt on his shoulders had also been shifted unto Arthur's. They were baring it together.

Arthur straightened slightly as if forgetting that he had been actually talking to someone else other than himself (or maybe his "magical friends"). "W-Well anyway it doesn't matter! Alfred and I are no longer dating." He finished stiffly, clamming up.

Gilbert looked at him in surprise. "What! Since when!"

Arthur returned to his knitting. "…A couple nights ago."

"Why? You didn't have to break up because of me."

Arthur scoffed. "Don't have such a bloody big head. It wasn't because of you." Gilbert made a face at him because of the insult before he became serious again.

"Then why?"

"Because…" Arthur hesitated and seemed to contemplate how to word his next sentence, "he wants to help his brother become happier."

"By having sex with him?" Gilbert accused.

"Last I heard Matthew rejected even a hug from Alfred." Arthur commented lightly. Gilbert didn't respond suddenly wondering if Alfred had been trying to put a move on his brother. A scowl creased his face for a second before he flipped over onto his back to glare at the ceiling.

"Where'd you hear that? The horse's mouth?"

"Kiku. Alfred confessed to him about it. I haven't talked to Alfred since we broke up."

"…Does it bother you that you two broke up?"

"…." Arthur didn't respond and instead began to pack away his knitting. He pulled on his backpack that he had carried over and glanced at Gilbert, who watched him. "I still lo- ….care for him. Just as I know you still care for Matthew. Hopefully we can all resolve this." Gilbert turned his head away, frowning at the wall. Arthur left with a soft thud of the door closing.

* * *

It had been a long time since Gilbert had smoked. He and Arthur had both taken it up in middle school when Arthur's older brother and sister had both started and they had stolen a few from the packs. They became addictive, what with Gilbert's troubled lifestyle with middle school assholes bullying him and Arthur going through his rebellious phase. Gilbert had started wearing dark eyeliner to give his mahogany eyes a fierce look and he and Arthur had become the resident punks. They often smoked on campus behind the portables or in the bathrooms. A few times they had been sent to detention or got referrals. After a stern lecture from his father, though, Gilbert eventually stopped smoking even as Arthur continued on his wild streak. He still partied with him, drinking alcohol and whatnot, but when Arthur and Ludwig had started fighting, Gilbert had to take a side. It wasn't long after that that Arthur stopped his punk lifestyle and became more like he was today. That was three years ago.

Gilbert dragged in a long intake of smoke and breathed out slowly. The cigarette smoke blended with his own visible breath in the chilly night air. Thanksgiving had brought with it a cold front and a small flurry of snow that was starting to barely coat the ground. It stuck to his boots as he walked, leaving grassy foot prints behind him in the ice. Technically he was going to be eighteen soon and he already appeared to be eighteen so no cops messed with him (not that they really cared anyhow). He heard a squeal of child and turned his head to spot two boys running around on the playground. It was dusk and the streetlamps were on but the kids' parents were there so it was fine. It was obvious they were siblings from the look of things. Gilbert took another drag of the cigarette.

_Arthur's right._ He decided suddenly, watching the children. He didn't like the situation the group was in. Everyone was obviously upset about it including Kiku and Nicole. He didn't need to be at school with them to know such. Even if Arthur didn't admit it, Gilbert knew enough to know that he was at least partially to blame why Alfred and Arthur broke up. And Gilbert also knew that Arthur had been going for Alfred almost as long as Gilbert himself had been longing after Matthew. The fight was not ridiculous, though. Cheating was a crime in Gilbert's book. Especially with incest involved. But he also understood Matthew and Alfred's situation.

He inhaled again and pulled out his cell phone, bringing up the internet and eventually the blog. Neither boy had updated at all. Gilbert decided to reread Matthew's entry the night Alfred had sex with him. He sat down to read and when he was finished he gazed at the sky. _Matthew apologized to me_. He closed his eyes. Had he been too harsh? Maybe he should've listened to Matthew more. He had stormed over there and broken up with him as soon as he had finished reading and comprehending the post. Thinking about it now, he may have been too rash. He suddenly found his cell phone to his ear and a number being dialed without his realization. It wasn't until a hesitant voice said, "Hello?" did Gilbert realize who he had called.

"Meet me at the park on Anderson." He told him.

"…Fine." The two hung up. Gilbert finished his cigarette and snuffed it out before lighting a new one.

* * *

He was happy that he was used to the cold as half an hour later the person he called finally arrived. Alfred was bundled up in his thick bomber jacket that he had bought last year at a vintage thrift store that was heavy but very warm. The jacket fit him better now that he had been working out some. Gilbert had gone through three cigarettes before he stood to face Alfred's solemn face.

"Hey." He stated.

"Hey." Alfred greeted back, looking slightly wary behind his glasses. The boy really did not like the cold. Gilbert didn't say anything else, instead staring Alfred down until the younger boy broke. "Why are we out here?"

"To talk. To fight maybe, depending on how much you piss me off." Gilbert admitted, already feeling a bit angry. His bitterness was bile on the back of his tongue.

"I'd rather not have to fight." Alfred tried to joke pathetically before he became serious again. He looked to be a bit scared, Gilbert noted. The boy sighed through his nose. "Gilbert, what happened was completely my fault. Don't take this out on Mattie."

"You're damn right, it's your fault!" Gilbert growled at him, scowling. Alfred flinched. Gilbert suddenly remembered that Alfred had been verbally abused as a child and his anger cooled quickly. He was angry and betrayed, but Alfred was still his friend. "Who the hell has sex with someone else's boyfriend the same day we got together?" He demanded in a lower voice.

Alfred glanced away, his head lowering slightly with guilt. _Good._ Gilbert thought, pleased. "I didn't know. I was really upset and didn't think about how Matt would feel. I was so used to just…having him. I didn't know that you two had gotten together. I'm sorry."

"It's still not right! You guys said in your blog that you two don't love each other in that way anymore! Then what the fuck was that?" Gilbert could hear his voice rising again and he quickly tried to grab control over it.

"We don't…but that night was an accident." Alfred met Gilbert's heated glare. "Matt and I promised each other when we got together with you and Arthur that we wouldn't do anything with each other. The most we've done is a little playing and none of it was sexual! Maybe a kiss, but that's it! Nothing more! Matt doesn't even-" Alfred seemed to choke on his words for a minute a passing sadness flitted through his eyes before his determination came back, albeit softer than before, "Matt doesn't even want me to hold him anymore. He's really torn up about this. And if you don't do something about it, then I'll just have to…kick your ass or something!"

Gilbert couldn't help it: he laughed. He laughed loudly. Alfred had sounded like a little kid threatening an adult. It was rather cute for such an idiot. "You can't ever beat me!" Gilbert bragged for a moment, smirking. It dropped after a few moments. "Fine, I'll talk to Matt. I'll _talk_. I'm not promising anything. Cheating is still cheating no matter the circumstances." He looked away. "But I want you to promise me something here and now: if I _ever_ find out that you two had sex again while one of you or both are dating someone else, I will personally beat you to hell. Get me?"

"Yeah. I got you."

"Good. And you'd better not be touching Matt sexually."

Alfred looked annoyed. "I'm not."

Gilbert moved to leave and end their conversation but paused. He had one more thing to ask. "Hey. Do you still 'want' Matthew?"

Alfred turned to walk away but didn't move yet. He didn't look at him. "…Matt is…my brother. That's the only way I want him. There's someone else that I 'want' want." Gilbert couldn't help his small smirk.

"Then you'd better get your shit settled soon too. As in now." He left Alfred at that, walking the long ways towards the twins' apartment. He heard Alfred start running in the direction of Arthur's house and couldn't help his slightly sadistic grin. Hey, a little unnecessary worrying on Alfred's part was just fine.

* * *

It was nearing eight thirty at night when Gilbert showed up at the bottom of the apartment. He stared up at Matt's door and pulled out his phone to call inside. Like he had suspected, Matthew didn't answer. He tried again, this time leaving a message. "Come outside." He said and hung up his phone, pocketing it. He turned his body towards the street and breathed hard into his hands. The temperature was dropping quickly with the sun gone. His heart was thundering in his chest. He didn't know if he could face Matthew. He could still remember his stricken face clearly in his mind as he had ended everything and the way the boy had called for him to come back. Gilbert had run off as fast as he could, though.

He was beginning to consider going up to knock on the door when soft footsteps through the thin snow alerted him to a presence. He looked over and saw Matthew, wearing a light jacket, cautiously making his way over. It was obvious that the boy was scared of him. He held himself as if cold. "You…you called?" Matthew asked.

"Yeah." Gilbert said in a soft voice. "I wanted to talk."

Matthew looked around, avoiding his eyes. "Here?"

"Yeah. I gotta go home in a bit."

"…Oh…"

Gilbert saw that Matthew wasn't going to talk first. "I wanted to say…sorry. How I confronted you was bad. I could've done better." He chewed his tongue for a minute as Matthew's eyes finally looked at him. Gilbert was nervous but determined. "But I want an apology too! Cheating is not cool! You're lucky I didn't punch your brother in the face!"

Matthew looked shocked just to be listening to Gilbert. He fumbled with his words. "A-Ah, um, I'm sorry! I really am!"

"Is that all?"

"…I don't know what else to say." Matthew whispered, his head down. Gilbert approached him a bit and Matthew flinched back, scared. Gilbert held up his hands, astonished. The brothers really were abused as children. The blog hadn't been wrong. The fear in Matthew's eyes was of a different level. He probably thought that Gilbert was going to hit him. He felt like he was dealing with timid animals.

"It's fine. Apologies are fine." He sighed heavily. Matthew's shoulders relaxed some. The two stood in silence for a period of time, neither knowing exactly what to say.

"You smell…."

"Huh?"

"You smell like smoke." Matthew repeated a little louder this time.

"Yeah. I was smoking."

"You smoke?" Matthew took a step closer.

"Sometimes. When I'm stressed."

"Were you stressed out?"

"…Yeah. It's because I haven't seen my friends in a while."

Matthew gave a small smile slowly. Gilbert was glad to see it. "We should all go out on the last day of break. Maybe to a…movie or something?"

"Or it could just be you and me." Gilbert said and looked away so he wouldn't see Matthew's surprise again. He felt a little embarrassed. It was bad enough confessing to Matthew but it was more awkward planning dates like this. "We could try this again. See where it goes."

Matthew's smile became a bit wider. His cheeks were a little pink under the lamp light from the cold. "That sounds fun."

"You won't cheat on me again with Al?"

Matthew shook his head. "I promise." Gilbert held out his hand to him and Matthew questioningly took it. He was tugged close, causing the sophomore to blush more. "What are you doing?"

"Let's go for a walk." He linked their cold fingers together. "And continue our talk."

"Don't you have to get home?" Matthew didn't disagree. The two began walking.

"Wouldn't be the first time I broke curfew." Gilbert grinned. The boy next to him smiled and laughed before tugging on his hand gently to give him a soft kiss. Gilbert was surprised this time.

"Thank you." Matthew whispered against his lips before the two began to walk again. Gilbert tightened his grip on Matthew's hand. He was worried for the future. It wouldn't be a happy one, he was sure. He and Arthur were both going to have it rough with these two. But they would keep the twins in line.


End file.
